live happy. live free.

with the bad things, it comes with good things.

HELLO S4!!!!!!!!!!!

i am mega happy.

i dont think i'm that materialistic, but......... now that i'm able to be easily connected to information, i am happy. (:

just last night, in awe power of Murphy's Law, my phone crashed. not the usual hang mode where it takes at least 4 mins to restart, it sooo died that i couldn't even charge it. initially, i thought that it was a total battery failure coz there was a battery icon with a red cross over it. but after a whole night's worth of charging, it remained unchanged. unable to switch on , unable to restart.

in the morng, i really wanted to go to church, whats more, its the annual AGM. i wanted to see the plans ahead and (because i'm also growing up) i'm becoming more concerned about the financial allocations. yea, but everything was against me. since my phone failed, i had no alarm clock. with total reliance on the phone, my bedside clocks were deactivated long time ago. and so, i woke up 9.30 when it was a 9am service while AGM was at 1pm. and as for the weather, it was raining. not the usual big rain kind, but a massive storm, so bad that s9gag had photos of floods with 9gag-ish comments and quotes along with it.

but mainly, it was the phone. i think i'm now at a point in life where i can't leave the house w/o my phone. i think i can if i want to disregard the whole idea of responsibility. but, i had to get the phone fixed, coz there's at least 20 group chats in it. 30% of which are important stuff and notices. 

besides, i didn't even know whats the root cause- the hardware or software malfunction.

at so, w/o breakfast and w/o brushing my teeth, i set out to solve the whole phone prob. finally,  and luckily, it was a software problem. and the only way was to restore it to factory settings by reformatting it and downgrade the OS to a one w/o hotspot connectivity. though it wasn't the best solution, at least it was a solution to get things going. it took me like 4 hrs to get everything back. one big thing i'm thankful for is the part where my contacts are synced with Google contacts, if not, i'm really doomed. 

ok. sorry for the technical bits.

ughs.

looking back at ytd, i really dky i was so negative. i'm just gonna attribute it to the monthly hormones. yes. all the blame on it. ok lah, with the teeny weeny bit of it due to emotional/anger-management probs. hahahas.

anyway. TGIM.

not that i'm excited about monday, but... ITS THE NEW WEEK.  bring it on bitches.

no more bb-uploading-to-fb(private album)-and-downloading-from-fb-to-my-itouch to instagram. now its just 1 button away. (: and looking forward to using google on the move!! (: and yes, FINALLY, the streaming of videos!! (: 

not a nice sat

woken up by the aching back.

went back to sleep.

woken up by the thundery roar of the clouds.

went back to sleep.

phone rings. alarm rings.

time for trng with a change in location due to the bad weather.



back was aching so bad that i cant really recall what i did during trng except the fact that i was stretching my hamstring and back each time i wasn't running. was frustrated.
and even to a point tt i broke down while we changed from our sport shoes to boots.

maybe coz the 15s seasons out, been slacked about my fitness and today, it was totally-in-my-face that my fitness suck and we're exactly 7 days away till we're in hk.

i know i'll come out of this. soon.
but for how long?



anyways. this wk in sch was a total waste of time.
since we're all done with the aviation modules, we're onto modules about Microsoft Word and stuff like that. 1 day 1 software. total hours in sch: 8hrs. total time actually spent on lesson:15mins.
we can't leave sch like that coz of the hours shit under the aviation authority and stuff like that.
so i brought my laptop, attempted to sort out some folders and finally had time to watch 'Flight'. interesting movie, not so much about aviation, but about alcoholism and lies; which i felt was a very realistic worldly issue. i dont really relate much to the alcohol part, but i do rmbr what the pilot said about lies during the final hearing "it was as if i had reached my lifelong limit of lies. i could not tell one more lie".
but yea, in that movie, the pilot manage to invert the plane which led to a glide after leveling it out.
in theory, that kind of commercial jet is not possible. once u roll in that angle, u've not only surpassed the design limits and structural tolerance, u would have completely lost all thrust and would stall with major breakages of airflow into the engines. but yea, for Hollywood's sake, its possible. ahhahas.





more often than not, we tell lies. white lies. cover ups to save someone, excuses, whatever. they are all lies. just because it may seem that lying is the best way out, even though legit, we lie to give some form of consolation or comfort. we get better for that moment, but not forever, not for long.


a quote from tumblr: hurt me with the truth but never comfort me with a lie.


its not something that i'm struggling with right now but during my teenage years; its just that the movie did brought up a few learning points.
i guess after going through a wide range of experiences and setbacks, i've more or less, learnt to accept things as it as, with its integrity still intact. being true to myself is the best way out. and so, i dont or, can't lie. ahhas. i get uncomfortable when i lie and it shows.



but yea, today sucks. and my back is still hurting.
its Day 1 and i cannot blame anything or anyone.

and i had a intensive argument with mother poon today.
frustrated. whatever.

one thing good that happened during the week is that.. i got a KINDLE. (:
my sis helped me get the kindle paperwhite online through a buyer. $175 and first hand! cheaper than if u get it over Amazon.com which would cost $200+ . yep. urgently get it to load up all my pdfs about aviation stuff so that i can bring to HK instead of playing candycrush 24/7. the pdf versions of all the books ( i got from the fd students of the other class) is not kindle-friendly, but at least i've got something  useful.


ok. till then.

the last Thrust

HELLLO.




almost been a wk since i've slowed down to think about my moments spent on earth.

today, conquered M15 GAS TURBINE. quite a big paper, and finally, an exam that is really an exam. coz this time, no solid 'hints' but just exam tips which is to study the areas that we need to focus on. enjoyed myself during the paper coz i feel damn smart. not because the paper was easy or difficult or that i was super clever or what, but its been long since i felt that i'm really being tested for the studying knowledge rather than sheer memory work.
the qns needed u to think logically, and its not so straightfoward. hahas.
out of 60 qns, i think there was about 10 that left me in much doubt though i had much reasonable explanations for it. out of the 10, i think i really dunoo 3.. never come across about it b4. (:

anyways. been studying.
so much that i didn't do anything. i think there was even a period of 6 days w/o any form of exercise.

anyway, i want to mention something about the weather last wk!

one of the days last wk, there was sucha a biggggg random storm in the night, that the next day, there was  a flood. eh. it's not those ankle deep kind k. it was like above my calves mid way k!

it was another day otw to sch...
it was at the slip road from bedok north road to Tamp ave 10.. beside there is like a huge sand pike.
that slip road is 2 lane.
as i approached it, there was a jam that's not usually there.
then, i saw about 7-8 bikes at the side. it was abit wierd.. so i stopped behind one of the guys and asked him what's up infront. he just said 'look' and used his eye to point in that direction. then i gapsed.
tmd.hahas
almost knee-deep muddddy FLOOD WATER. i wanted to take a photo coz the rain was just reduced to a slight drizzle, but since i still had a long way ahead to make it to sch in this horrible condition, i didnt' do it. regret, but yea, not worth it i guess. hahas

the length of the flood was probably about 200m. but up ahead, there's already a car that's stalled. all 4 wheels were submerged.
there was buses, lorries, cars trying to get pass the 2 lane road that's severely flooded and blocked.
i really hesitated alot. i mean, my engine was alrdy like half submerged.
coz i didn't know what's the tolerance of Sparky. but i rmbr images of those rural countries that those kup-kias could still operate in high level floods. ahhahahhas.
then, thanks to some Engine knowledge via my M15, and also knowing the where the sparkplug is for my bike, i was confident tt Sparky can make it. hahhas.

so yes, i went ahead, with all the other bikers looking at me.
i damn scared. i switched on my signal light and turned to look at the 2 cars behind me. hahas. then i embarrassedly stuck my hand out to signal that i needed some space and clearance in case i should fall. HAHAHS. jokes.

since engines were running from other vehicles, there were waves can. it was hard to keep my forward wheel steady and i know my rear drum brake is quite inefficient. i was like gear 1 and holding on to my clutch lever. as i pull the throttle to try and move, the engine wasn't that steady, pok pok pok... like gg to die. so it was like throttle clutch throttle clutch in gear 1 at maybe 15km/h. ok and maybe both my legs were off the pedals and hoping to get some balance from the ground.

it was gross.

but thanks to my trusty Crocs.. my shoes were still good and fast drying.
ok. and so, i made it to sch in 30 mins. 10 mins more than normal. everyone in sch was late too. so they had like 15 mins grace.




ok yea. ahhahs. #achievementunlock.
yamahaSpark135 best. ahhahas. can't image all those Gilera, Vespa and all with their small wheels...
can't believe i actually type the whole experience out. ahahs.


anyway.

and my teammate who looks like Edward Cullen.

from now till end may, its all those non-aviation modules. like computer skills, report writing, ya-dah ya-dah.... :/ bah. back to those Business-ish mods. but it'll be quick! thinking of doing M15 cat B paper. but $80 and i dont that i should be that confident.
oh wells!

(:

hope all's well on ur side.


more photo editings!

Resilient

great win tonight ladies. 6-2 (: it was a good fight between Todaks and both sides played well with good sportsmanship. 

these few wks of STL is becoming more intense as the Finals draw near. sometimes emotions and fiery desire can diminish the whole good game of sportsmanship and Touch so for tonight, it was good. (:

personally, i think i did well coz i was focused.
often a times, we tend to think what we should not do, or too much of the outcome that we simply just overlook the small steps that lead up to the big picture.
this team has quite a wide range in terms of level of experience. but after 7-8 wks, i'm glad we're finally able to be on the same page to fight out a good game. and really, its times like this where i truly enjoy the sport and comrade.


and look! we've got a banner made specially for us!
one of the guys actually took HALF DAY OFF just to do this banner can.

how to not be encouraged and do ur fellow teammates and supporters proud!


:')


ok
so far,
so good.



ytd was the inter-constituency games for our respective GRCs. been competing for Kampong Chai Chee GRC. ahhas. been long since i've bowled and competed. but glad to see familiar good ol' opponents and long lost coaches who played a major part in my growing years as a teenager.

i didn't play well coz of the lacking in consistency. the lanes were tricky too. so long nv bowl, then come out with Reverse oiling pattern; outside oily inside dry. couldn't really control much, shots were really jumpy. but we managed to get 2nd for the East Coast Cluster! hahas. was a tight fight between us  and the teams from Changi Simei.

anyway. Bowling is a sport that's close to my heart for it has at least made up of 75% of my time in my growing years and been a big moulding block. not gonna go into the details, but though i played like shit, it was still good to catch up with some of the coaches, old teammates and opponents.

Gas Turbine.

starting to feel stress for the exam on Monday.

30 chapters.

and i'm left with less than a week.

but thank God, that the more i learn about it, the more i wanna learn and understand it.

lastly, i wanna blog some stuff about my teammate Hugo, who broke his neck during a rugby game.

prior to posting, i had a little struggle about what title to put for this blog post. 

in the end, i put 'resilient'. 

the game vs todaks.

the inter-constituency games.

and even through my GasTurbine module...

it all shows that if we're resilient enough, focused enough, committed enough, we can one day, really achieve our desired goal.

and lastly, Hugo.

hahas. we went Gleneagles to visit him on fri evening.. and turned out that he got discharged in the afternoon! ahhahas. i mean, it was good news. but for a neck injury, 1 wk in the hospital is way too fast.

a brief information brief, he's actually a hooker! sucha small sized boy for a hooker. but it wasn't a ruck /scrum or anything. it was just (literally) a killer pass from his teammate that made his opponent smashed him once he got the ball.

he fell back hard. and the opponent was big enough to fall on him hard so i think the collision and impact was so hard that it broke 2 vertebraes in his neck. u know, he was ALMOST paralysed. thank God that it was just a few cm off the CNS (central nervous system). way way too close.

so we went to his house and paid him a visit. 

he's looking great.

honestly, too good and too positive!

basically, he's got metal plates inside to support his vertebrae and 2 metal rods (to be removed after 2 yrs) to support his neck while he goes through the tough recovery physio phase. 

 he can't play rugby forever. no more contact sports.

Touch is fine, but not too soon.

if u've seen him play, he's really a quick and agile player. 

watched him grow up from a young boy and now, a fine gentleman...

i mean, teenagers of 16-18 yrs do grow up fast right.

in trainings, we dont really talk much. just the game talk 'ball left' 'ball right' 'you did gd'. 

but to hear what he's got to say about the whole freak accident, made me feel abit reflective. here i am, all good to go.. but at times, i complain, i dont give my best and stuff like that.

and there he his, can't even turn his neck, trynna catch up on his school work and stuff, and still so positive.

i mean he was like "yea.. freak accident, i dont blame anyone.. unlucky.. but yea, at least i'm not paralyzed and at home now." and he's thinking of picking up some referee-ing skills to keep up with the game and still have a part to play in it.

#passion.

i mean, imagine if i am in his shoes. no more rugby. no more bowling, dance, photography... and it might even affect my job prospect as an Engineer. i'd probably be wallowing up in self-pity.. re-tracking the moments on how i could have prevented it, blaming everyone in the world but myself or my Faith may even be shattered.

really. Thank God so much for protecting him and also, blessing me with a healthy self. 

ok. thank God for these few days that keeps me up and alive.
there's so much to be done of my fitness and academics, but i believe if we all focus and really soak up the process, through our stumbling blocks and failures, we are capable of becoming more than we think we can.

sudden inlet

ok. i'm feelin it now.

Gas Turbine module.
its probably the module that i'm secretly looking forward to other than the those abt aerodynamics and stuff like that.
but its so much! and its so hard to conceptualize and put them into nice tables. :/

i'm just a passer-by

anyway.
Popeye's delivery (at bedok point) started extending their delivery services till midnight yesterday.. so i worked till 12am today.
and omg. idk, so many orders today! i sent a total of 8! and its all not those otw kind. sometimes when we're luck, we get like 2 orders at Bedok Reservior at the same time. but today, i keep getting one at Bedok South, one at Bedok Reservior, one at Tanah Merah.
totally didn't have time to study at all. secretly hoping for a big storm, but no, that didn't happen.


so, i'm back home alrdy, and suddenly, i'm feeling all busy again.
its like, 8am wake up to cook lunch, and then to sch from 9-5pm. work from 6-12am. and now, i'm home, but i've got to edit pre-wedding photos for my client who thankfully, is my friend; also, have yet to update/edit the team's blog template asap.



bah.
what happned to all the free time w/o official trngs.




while sending orders today, i had perks of time to think about random stuff.
many many many thoughts.
tweeted out alot.

and yes, i did feel alone. (i mean like duh, i was alone. ahhas) but i mean like, as i looked at families, at couples and little kids, it would be nice to have someone to mean the world to you and vice versa. but right now, i'm just feeling very selfish, with a tinge of low self-esteem; not being able to commit to anything and with a perfectionistic mindset. no motherly instincts yet (which is quite worrying to me at times) to drive me to really grow out of myself and grow up.




had a very short h2h session with my manager, who is a very sweet soft spoken lady. as the only girl rider, its easy to be close to all the lady-staff who needs a listening ear. she told me that she was very stressed and wanted to start smoking. she said that smoking can help to relieve her stress and that her other manager also smokes to feel better. about 2 months back, her dad passed away. i told her b4 that if she needed anyone to understand her, i can be there for her coz i can really empathize with her situation.
yea, and i went on being naggy and told her not to smoke and all coz it could not only have those infamous negative health imapact, but also financial impact since 1 packet may be like 2 hours of work.




then i did think back.
there were times i did think of smoking.
its a very real struggle of an everyday teenager. i tried once before in bangkok during Asian champs at the back alley (hahahs) but didn't like it. besides, all those epic-want-to-die-moments during FITNESS trngs kept replaying through my mind, rmbing how chui my fitness can be and i dun want that to be affectted. also those reasons to smoke socially would then be excuses to satisfying individual cravings right. i can't afford that financially too.
i dun think now its about being socially accepted or what, but more of being socially welcomed?
lazy to explain.




another thing to share..
drew this out 2 nights ago.
wanted to draw sometime proper. apart from all those mechanical drawings, its been long since i've spent time to draw the things i wanna draw. decided to draw you. i dont like drawing portraits, but its good that it aint that good to be obviously recognizable. but this is the only way i can get close to you, again.

apart from you, 

there's also you who has messed me up real good. hahas

and you know, i miss you. but i can't exactly say it, and i wont say it.

somehow, as much as i hope things will get better, i dont want tt too well, coz i dont exactly know what i want.

too clear. too ambiguous. 

i want to give up.

i want to get away from myself when i'm in this mode.

on a random note, (i want to say this now here, so that 10 yrs later, i and look back here with regret, proving my statement to be true) 

i know that 10 yrs later, i'm gg to regret not signing on for the army or even the airforce and yes, or to have a major part to play in civil defense as a fireman/ paramedic.

i'm still thinking if 2 yrs off is worth it to just pursue some experience in more humanly beneficial things  at the expense of a 2 yrs headstart in the aviation industry as an engineer. 

i'm at the age now where i can say that i'm neither young anymore, nor am i that old to give up everything and focus on building a proper career.

ok. there are really too many thoughts to put into words.
sometimes i feel that the more i give in to writing it all, somehow, all the more i cant let go of the things i'm holding on to too much in life.

lastly, happy Siblings day!

thank you for pushing me around,

literall in those airport trolleys ever since young everytime.

(:

super sleepy

almost delirious. 

going against.

eh jokes.

the paper was so straightforward that it was NOT straightforward at all.
the questions were too ambiguous.
and its not considered a difficult paper.

(ignore this post till 75% way if u totally detest mechanical shit)


-


the biggest frustrating qns about Propeller Blade was:
Q7) If the Forward Velocity is LESS than Rotational Speed of Propeller blade, the angle of attack
a) increase
b) decreases
c) no change



ok. the redundant notes gives 3 scenarios. (it would help alot if i got the image of the 3 vectors. but nvm. i try to explain here k)
to help with my explanation abit, in theory,
- Blade angle = from chordline to plane of rotation (vertical line down)
- Angle of Attack (AOA) = angle from from blade chordline to relative wind.

so.
scenario 1.
if Stationary, Blade Angle = AOA
(since there is no forward velocity)

scenario 2.
if there is an increase in Forward Velocity, the AOA decreases.
(since the speed of rel. wind increases, deceasing the angle)

scenario 3.
if there is an increase in the rotational speed, the AOA increases
(as with vectors, the rel. wind line will move towards the plane of rotation)


ok. so that being established, back to the question, i'm probably thinking that they're trying to say that what if the forward velocity decreases. if so, the AOA will, a) increase; since its slower right. (and after verification with the tchr, he says like such too.) tmd.
but what i think, it should be c) no change.
the question just state that the fwd vel is less THAN rotational speed. it does state any changes (increase or decrease) in either the forward velocity or the rotational speed. and since there's no change, its a constant, and hence, no change to the AOA.
MAKE SENSE RIGHT.
so i dun care. i put C on the answer sheet. coz A really cannot la.
but on the qns paper, i circled C, pointed to A and scribbled all over the qns with the vector diagram in mild frustration.



-


ok. another debatable Qns on geometric pitch.
Q) Geometric Pitch is the distance moved...
a) in one revolution
b) in one revolution without slip
c) in one revolution with slip


ok, in theory, Geometric Pitch is equivalent to the effective pitch + slip.
Geometric Pitch is just based on the distance it should be travelling in 1 rev based on just the geomtry of it, w/o taking performance into consideration. Effective pitch is then the actual distance it advances while Slip is the bad things that hinder it from reaching its geometric pitch distance.

ok. manage to find this pic online to help my explanation.
so technically, if i want to be anal, i can say A also can coz its not wrong. but yea, its MCQ, so we should choose the best option right.
so i choose B; because it is the distance move (in 1 rev) without taking the slip into consideration. right?

but if u actually follow the notes/ what teacher say and stuff like that without really giving much thought, you would think its C. (because Geometric Pitch = Slip + Effective pitch) hence mathematically, u would think that 'geometric pitch is with slip') make sense?
and yea, i think everyone in class put C. and i secretly think that i'm going to be wrong though for this qns, i really think B is the ans.





-

thats the thing about my sch exams. they dun phrase the qns properly. most of the questions are quite straightforward that they dont bother to vet it or smth because it could be double meaning. if a Marketing paper is of this standard, i'm sure the student clan is gg to riot their way through. engineering alone is so diff.
anywaytoday alone, there were 2 typo errors in the qns paper. one of the questions had options like (i can't rmbr the exact qns, but the idea is there la)
a) blade angle
b) chordline
c) chordline
-_-"
and the spelt 'long-term' as 'long-ter'.
ok. maybe i'm being abit too wee-bit OCD for an exam paper by my sch. but hey, its an exam paper which determines whether one has to retake/remodule/repeat the whole course after all right. maybe the quality assessor should treat it with abit more respect right.



yea. and our sch like to give qns not from the textbook nor mentioned by tchr.
its not those where u can use logic/commonsense to derive an answer, but question that shows either u know it, or duno it. for eg. Q: how often is the blade inspected? a) daily b) 6-9 months c) weekly.
in our text, it says 'at regular intervals' and refer to AMM/ OEM.
whatever.


pheeew. glad to have got that all out of the system coz no one in class understands my frustration.
20 Q.  max 4 wrong to pass. 5 wrong fail.
i've got 1 qns wrong so far (the one above) and if the above 2 qns are wrong and if i shade carelessly wrongly on my ans sheet... i'm sooooo gg to first-time fail this MCQ paper ever.




--





ok. onto some rugby news.

towards the end of trng today, i heard that one of my touch teammates who plays contact rugby just broke his neck during rugby and had an 8hr emergency surgery. he thought that he was gg to be paralyzed but thank God he's recovering well and fine. he's the youngest player in my team, 16 yrs old... and he wont be able to play rugby again.
):
heard the news and just felt so grief stricken. really damn sad.


and as i was otw home, recieved some emails about the 14 yr old rugby player from raffles who collapsed during his jog... they need lotsa money coz the total medical bill is $40k but his insurance covers up to $10k only. and he's diagnosed with kidney and liver failure.. so the following treatments are gg to cause lotsa financial stress on the family. :/






thats the thing.
sometimes i ask myself y i play rugby, why i ride a bike.
sometimes when i'm home with all the cuts, bruises and swelling, i have to find ways to be stealth about it and hide it form mother poon. usually she finds out when i leave the ice bag out to dry the next day. the worst one was my knee injury.. had to walk super normaly to the toliet to bathe as i come home from trng and act as it nothing happen. yea. and when she found the tapes to tape the holes on my bike rainjacket and pants, i had to tell her that they were old and erm... wear and tear. hahas



jokes.
that's something about life.
i'm probably not in that phase where i say 'it challenges me' 'it makes me a better person' and stuff like that, but now, i guess its all about the experience.
like what my rugby coach once mentioned during one of the intense mental talks "if its not now, when are u gg to experience all the expressions that u'll never face if u continue to not put in ur effort, and start playing good rugby?"
not the exact words, it these are the words that i know will stay with me.


quite tired now. gonnna crash.
nite.

what propels you

M17 - Propellers.


Tmr exam. shouldn't be a prob coz this exam its quite basic, not that the module is straight forward though.


lecturer brought up the PCU for us to see..

not gonna bore you by explaining the whole chunk here.
but its quite an interesting concept and i think the Wright Brothers and Leonardo Da Vinci are just amazing people.


anyways. though things got abit more interesting towards the week, i must say that i (finally) got that wee-bit feeling of being 'bored and stale' towards Aviation after almost coming to a year into it. maybe its coz of the good week of holiday. ahhas. and i revisited the thought that what if i chose the Sports path over aviation.

the initial plan was either gg into Sports Physio and work towards my very original Doctor-dream (with slight deviation) or the current path which i am now on- Aviation. i mean i would have excelled more in with the physio stuff coz i've also got great interest in Anatomy, Biology and all those sports modules. and besides, Sports is more lively, more likka lifestyle kinda thing. i mean like, Aviation is all about Physics, boring metal stuff, 1 or 2, yes or no.

but then again, idk how to put it but, i've got this special thing towards Aviation.
the more i know about it, the more i want to know about it.
and the more i know about it, the more i am amazed by it and the more i want to be part of it.


in secondary sch, i did triple science and out of the 3, hated Chemistry the most, struggled with Physics, and read Biology likka interesting storybook. i mean, to study physics, it was just pure memory of the formulas and ways to calculate it.. never much wanting to understand it.. Maths was never much of a problem. so to be re-meet with my love-hate r/s with Physics, it feels diff.

physics. i was once able to conquer it blindly even though i hate it.
however, that being said, maybe coz i'm growing up or what, but i'm starting to see obvious shifts in my perspectives. some for the better; others, i'll just leave it as it is for now.






ANYWAY.
quite a week.


worked on Thurs. and it was RAINING HEAVILY.
secretly happy coz it meant studying time (and getting paid at the same time).
so the system was shut off. but..... 1 order came through before the rain... so had to send.
it was too heavy and was advise to take a taxi for delivery and then claim afterwards.
i mean i could secretly ride in the rain and claim the 'taxi money' for myself, but i needed to produce the receipt. so yea, good try. hahahs.

it was stupid la.
the order is like $21.90. and the cab fare to and fro was $13. peak hr charges. slow traffic. jam.
what kind of profit right. but policy 就是 policy.

and GUESS WHAT WHO.

one of my irritating classmate. JOKES. ahhahhahas. 

ok la. thank God it was a familiar face, so it ain't that bad. 

so yes, after the rain stopped at about 8pm, the system opened again. 3 riders. no orders till like 9.30pm. so it was self-study whole day for me. and it was good. hahas. (: 

SATURDAY.
epic Sat wkend with the Women's A Finals and important game for Mens, and Semis for Mixed B.
tables are turned.
but its gonna be an interesting remaining wks of STL. so fast, 10wks is coming to an end soon.

had abit of time.. before meeting mother poon.
so i went to church and had an intense 2 hours straight of ME time with music.
one of the new yr resolution is to play the drums properly. i can play super basic stuff, but i needa start being serious abt it if i wanted to start playing properly in a band.

the church facilities were fully used up.
so with the borrowed key, i hid myself in... Ascension Kindergarden (where our music instruments are there for the Junior Sunday Sch service).
in seclusion, for 2 straight hours, i practiced drumming. got abit sick of it coz i have no talent to self-deviate from the standard beats nor the skill to follow closely to the CD, yet. i didn't have a usable way to connect to Youtube for ideas or breakdowns and stuff like that, so it was really quite a trying time. besides, the drumsticks i was using were of 2 different kinds. one was with the muffler... and the other was a broken normal drumstick. ahhahs. yup and hence, the different length, weight and whatsoever.

and since there was also the piano and guitar avaliable, i used them to play songs that came up in my ipod. since my Blackberry sucks, i can't really google much for chords and stuff like that w/o draining the battery. so i just based on hearing and trying to figuring stuff out. so in that sense, it did pushed me to learn more on my own, which is a good thing la.



Ascension Kindergarden hall.
it was where i had my first Graduation Ceremony.
where i put on my first square hat.
it was a big hall to me, then.
hahas. i rmbr gg back to the hall when i was about 18 yrs old. i was quite stunned to realize that the hall shrank... NOT; for it was i who grew so much taller and bigger. and it was really so significant because everything was the same. just that they installed airconds now. everything remained the same. so to me, it was really shocking...

how the blue stage because so small. it took me at least about 20-30 quick runs to get from one end to the other, but now, perhaps in 15 strides, i'm able to get from one end to the other.
:')


so yes, in that seclusion, i had ME time. finally.
though not as productive as i wanted it to be towards drumming, it was still quite a fruitful time.



SUNDAY.
had to miss the Blacks outing cum teambonding at Sentosa for QING MING JIE.


Yishun Columbarium.
gone were the days where the whole family needed to charter the bus to travel to ulu place and find the graves of our ancestors that might be hidden by tall shrubs. litreally 扫坟墓 (sweep the graves).
now all at the yishun columbarium - mum's mum, dad and step dad, and 1 brother.
todally, i finaly made an effort to figure out that she got 4 brothers and countless missing sisters that were being sold in the olden days. i could nv figure out the no. of uncles i always thought that it was a big no, some dead some alive and stuff like that.

they're all seperated coz the 'homes' were 'fully booked'. ahhas. so mother poon said that she had bought her place alrdy "chop house first, if not fully booked, then cannot be beside your father".  ._."

which was true;  hence, my dad's niche is currently occupying 2 spaces.

yea. so anyway, the whole family had to travel to seng poh road just to visit my dad. 

hahas. #special indeed huh.

dad parent's are like unknown. even when he was alive, he didn't know where his parents grave are. no one knows how they looked like properly and stuff like that as well. 

all we know is that my dad's dad was a soldier who got killed in a bomb blast in Malaya when the Japs came, and his mum died of grief / hypertension or some sort... all when he was 5 yrs old.

quite sad ah.

but yea, one thing sad is that i'll never get to know how it feels like to have a grandma or grandpa.

its all a total different upbringing i suppose.

and yes, finally got to see my fav boy.
(who lost so much weight!)
but still as naughty. check out his perspiration below his nose. ahhhahahas
 

bah! and i'm still not done with the editinggggg...






again, just a reminder...
(photo taken by Roxas in Sepang airport base maintenance)

slowly adjusting. but surely. 

never be too confident in life's Pitch Stops unlike those found in propeller assemblies.

hello

hello i'm back.

see. its just that period of the month. literally. ahhas.

been good. 

got top in class for higher maths. but its not 100/100. 97. hahas. whatever.

heard that the next intake for siaec is perhaps in Aug.

and according to today's distributed timetable (which always changes) sch ends unofficially on 28 May. which is like in less than 2 months... abt 57 days.  ! (: (: (: (: (: .cant.wait.

had a stayover at Eveleen's place.

and its.......

hahahas. since we all like disney princesses, we wanted a themed stayover. hahas. 

DISNEY PRINCESS NIGHT! *throws glitter and confetti around*

i like Ariel, but since it was taken up, i shall be Mulan. ahhahhas. 

we're supposed to be dressed in the colour theme and have a unique item. HAHHAS. 

anyways, no effort though.. we just ransacked eveleen's cupboard. hahas. u must checkout Pocahaontas' black hair.. jasmine has short hair... so we used a black t-shirt. hahahas.

not bad huh.

anyway, it was a mixed wkend. ups and downs. random big rain in the midst of the hot humid and yet supposedly dry weather.

but. i managed to date this girl out. 

fellow ijgirl, tp classmate and excellent hurdler. 

(:

v special to me. and really, it was sucha good night.

been looong since i'm able to go out one on one with someone close that i can just be myself and really enjoy each other's presence, soaking up in each other's rubbish. 

its also my first time having a peek at her room. hahhas. 

more h2h and yrs of friendship to come! (:

yup. so that's just it.

recently been struggling in trng.

its one of those... periods where i'm feeling super dry towards rugby and touch. 

previously, the whole 6monthsoutofsports did make my life miserable and increased my anxiety to be up and running again. but now that i'm almost 90% back into full speed and even been able to play competitively w/o my knee guard, i'm starting to lack some form of drive to not just improve, but to just play or simply turn up with positivity and stuff like that. 

i rmbr the first day when i was back into playing touch, i was damn happy, didn't sub. full speed. all the way. every moment on the field was spent wisely and to my best.

now that i'm mechanically getting fine, mentally, i might have slackened.

maybe also coz i'm not performing well recently, my drive has de-proved and hence, de-prove in my performance, de-proving my drive and it goes on and on likka classic vicious cycle. i mean technically, one cannot 'de-prove' right.... so i mean, just take it as not performing well la k.

le sigh.

but ytd, i tried to snap myself out of the pit and my attitude towards trng did improve abit and it was physicaly obvious when we starting doing the drills and line defence.

stepping up ur mental game really improves everything.

idk but it just goes to show how easily one can just take things for granted. 

sometimes, i try to remind myself to be thankful that i'm breathing fine today. really.

its a small little thing that is just so.... insignificant in our daily lives (if not we would be dead right). but when i rmbr those days that i've  got a runny or blocked nose, i rmbr those trying moments that i would do anything to be breathing normally again. 

in life, we strive to be our best. ok, maybe not everyone in the world understands or appreciate that at least we've got the strength and fighting effort to be in pursuit towards hope, but more often than not, we get exhausted and be distracted from the things that dont matter which eventually throws us off-focused. and when we're in that mode, we can be sure to be dull and be in that zone of 'finding' oneself and start relating to emo tmblr posts again. 

we really shouldn't be bothered abt how pp look at us or even try to negatively bring us down.

while ppl try to look down upon us or may even mock at the little seemingly insignificant things and effort we try to put in, we should just let them be. what good does it bring to us if we resort to reacting with self-pity and fill our hearts with unnecessary sadness. to begin with, we shouldn't even be having expectations on such things right.

on another note, i've got stuff to say abt prioritizing, time management, skipping dates and not keeping promises.

its quite a long chunk but i guess i'll leave it till here for i've got a quarter more photos to edit. 

yep. that's abt it for the night.

have a good wk everyone.

"Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity."

- 1 Timothy 4:12 -

/ tonight

we are young

so let's set the world on fire 

we can burn brighter 

than the Sun