it was an accident

what a work week.

last tuesday, work almost killed me. literally man.
we're supposed to send some parts to seletar.. otw out from alh and passing changi v, there's this traffic junction... u know those 2 lane roads.... ok wait. i'm gonna screen shot my 'accident report' ahhas.

yea. so we're the lorry. the car's at fault to turn out suddenly. thank God that we're only travelling at 30-35km/h and about 10-15m away. HOWEVER, our accelerator failed to rebound back to neutral state.. so upon hitting the brakes, the car skidded.  it was about 3-4 secs of uncontrolled driving and it was enough to scare me abit. you could see the car skidding uncontrollably while i see my colleague trying to stop the car.. and so it finally hit the veh before coming to a stop. like really no control man. thank God again that it wasn't a motorbike that we hit or smth. if not it could have been devastating.

so we waited about 1 hr for the towtruck since the accelerator just couldn't function properly.. in the mean time, there was a another lorry which broke down just 15m away. hahas. since it was a logistics company, we exchanged contacts and name cards... so not bad.. there's some business opportunity / alternative solution.

but yea. long day i had. skipped trng.

before that, it was a good day actually. was helping with some urgent repair matters.... had the opportunity to explore the workshops and stuff like that. even went into the huge storage room for all those aircraft consumables. from adhesives to engine oil... it was cool coz the store room had lotsa and the different but familiar cans of engine oil.. saw those cans that i used during my OJT at line main.. all the memories man!




work's been up and down. as the company is officially embarking on a big change this april, things are pretty... up and down. to me, it just feels directionless. idk how legit it is for me to explain stuff on a public space, but all i can say is that... if there's no ownership, u're just gg to fight for short-term profits even if it means to operate at a long-term loss.


we're all human after all.


no matter how honest, respectable and 'correctly concerned' one may be, i guess the extremities of conditions and situational pressures really pushes one to do things / make decisions out of their defined boxes just to satisfy the immediate demands.
its pretty sad.
and even if the... um.. situation on the right platform, w/o the genuine support and clear long-term directions, it's just gg to be an uphill battle. as it gets steeper, instead of reaching for the top, everyone is just struggling to keep the footing. it's really gg to be a waste.
and that's really not how a profitable business should work, especially one w/o the capability.
it just dont make any sense. so really, quit thinking about profit and revenue. we need to really start making losses for long-term sustainability.




hahas. does that whole part sound likka love life? hahahas
maybe that applies to my life also.
just because of all the sudden... desperation or drive for whatever as per se, we make impulsive decisions though they would have gone through thorough evaluation.
these decisions are probably short term. we dont want to make the losses coz we only care for the moment.




whatever it is, this week seeems likka full work week because whenever i had space/time to think, u were in my thoughts whole time. i really dont want all these thoughts coz it really drains me as they lead to me longing for you unconditionally.
i saw you the other day and it really made me freak out to some extent. yea, being a rather extremely expressive person, i had no choice but to blog on the spot. hahas.




bah.
can you just come grab me tonight, leaving me no choice but to watch the shiny night stars together?
hahas. not sure if singapore's clouded night skies will allow that though. how about fireflies? ok, not the ATR 42. hahas.
i think its quite funny coz that day, when i said that i wanted to watch planes landing with you at the night sky...you disagreed with your astute self and was quite rational about it saying that there's not much arrivals and departures at that time... ahhas.. which was true. totally felt quit dumb-witted for that moment.
i mean like, though i'mma business development person who's pretty familiar with the flight schedules, i wasn't able to think logically like that. ahhas. yes, cheers to you, and though no planes for us for that night, whatever time spent with you is just nice enough. good thinking though. hahas.




hahas. i'm really starting to get worried should one fine day when i've decided to make this space public again... and u'd start reading back all these posts. i really hope you dont but u probably will eventually.
other readers who reads this may also see a different side of me.
hahas. i'm probably darker than anyone can imagine coz i myself dont even know.
sucha confused kid.




u know at this point of time, idk if i can say 'i love you'.
yea, after all that man. i guess i just need to understand that i dont understand (hahas. the pun) the true meaning of these 3 words, or, i've failed to recognize the unfathomable values / principles that comes along with it. not that i dont want to say it, but i think unworthy to say it to u. even to just drop you a 'i miss you' seems to be something that i need to put on all the stops. reverse thrust maybe.
i just dont want it to make it difficult for you eventually. u probably dont agree to this, but i should be clear about this by now.



anyway, i miss you tonight and being a girl, though i never want you to know this, i know that u would eventually read this space again, so i'm saying it. hahas. #girl.  aiya, since i'm trying hard to not msg u... lets just use this space la. may u have a good night at work/ sleep and that i wont be a distraction to you.