keepingg

gd to be at trng. so, didn't go aunty vivien's dinner in the end.
one of the possibly rare trngs we're gonna have.
was at sa field. blacks was also having their games.



hope more ppl can come.
we can start playing tgt.
understand each other.



gd chance.
but seriously, for the amt of effort we're putting in tgt as a team as compared to others, we dont deserve anything.
but really, i hope it's enough.



after that, i went church.. to bathe. ahhas.
then saw the rehearsal for Coffeeshop Night. first time i'm not doing anything. feels wierd. but ok.
then went for eve's celebration at zouk.


the queue was too long. so vinc, jov and i ended up at this hk cafe down the road.
not many ppl turn up... and that's sad.
i just dont like it when ppl say they are gg and last min pang seh. if inform, still ok. some act as if nv recieve msg. some, nv even say. somemore it's her 21st pls.



sezari's version of Touched by an Angel playing's on the radio now.
not very nice actualy. i think sylvia's one would sound much better.
ohoh. playing my current fav Kings and Queens by 30 secs to Mars now.




anyways.
i have 22 more hours to put 2009 aside.
will probably do a recap in the next post i hope. hahas.
i really hope next yr will be a new one for me. i rly dont like this yr... the large part of it.
and also, its really a mark for me to just put all past behind and march on to more effective and productive goals.




let me just have one big sigh...
HAAAIZZZZ.

youtubeddd

morng 9am, i went physio.
then, wasted time at TM..

then travelled 2hrs to the other side of the world again. reached there, and realised that i got the timing wrong. wasted lots of time.



yea. and according to FB, lenny saw me chasing after the bus. that's damn unglam.
some more with my obvious white tapped up ankle.
i chased 2 bus today. felt so driven to chase after the bus.




then came home.


Innocence by Avril played on my ipod.
went home, set up.






whole day, youtubed. piano. guitar.
haiz.
i really want a studio.

now, i'm really just anyhow figuring out my ear and all the shit. i really want to know more abt music.. like reading notes kind of playing for the piano.. i'm not so bad with the guit.. but i really can't read with the piano.

i mean like.. i wanna play all those humongously nice piano pieces and be in the songs. i like.
then, when i write songs, i wanna put into notes. its like.. now, i'm using recording devices like hp/ipod/com/cam to rmbr my songs i write on the moment. sometimes, i sing sing sing.. then when want to record.. FORGET. great.

i dont want to just know and feel the song. sometimes, its gd to be technically knowledgeable i guess.

hahas.
haiz.


one of the things/ppl i've youtubed today; David Sides. he is damn good. he's smth like that i've always dream of becoming. its like.. when u're there-there, u can make nice songs ur own; how u want ur fav songs to be.




oh ya. saw these 2 shirts i like at Bossini. $15 each man. not the marian-kind of cheap... + didn't have enough money. so NVM. hopefully mum passes Bossini and buy for me. AHHA.
i'm rly starting to like Bossini clothes.





-



playing on the radio now...
is a damn evil song. its not helping anyone. hahahas.
just makes u dwell in ur emo-ness. HAHA.


Time for Miracles- Adam Lambert

It's late at night and I can't sleep
Missing you just runs too deep
Oh I can't breathe thinking of your smile

Every kiss I can't forget
This aching heart ain't broken yet
Oh God I wish I could make you see
Cuz I know this flame isn't dying
So nothing can stop me from trying

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love
No I ain't giving up on us

I just wanna be with you
Cuz living is so hard to do
When all I know is trapped inside your eyes

The future I cannot forget
This aching heart ain't broken yet
Oh God I wish I could make you see
Cuz I know this flame isn't dying
So nothing can stop me from trying

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love
No I ain't giving up on us

Baby can you feel it (feel it)
You know I can hear it (hear it)
So can you feel me feel you....

You know it's time....

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on love

You know I ain't giving up on us
You know I ain't giving up on
Oh I ain't giving up on us

i am damn weak.

i think i've totally lost my fitness.


had to set an alarm just to wake up at 1230pm to leave the house at 1pm.
one of the teams needed some players to play with them to prepare for their ivp.
and like omg. i felt damn damn slow.

haven't been playing seriously since STL...besides the once-a-wk club trng that's not v tiring. when i stand up, to get onto the field, flashing lights.
haiz. its like... my mind doesn't have enough blood to catch what my body's doing.


on the field, felt like i've lost all kinds of footing.
duno where to run. both on a and d.


JIA LAT.


what's more, i'm actually playing the same tournament as them.



fair. fat. flabs.



okok. ankle pain also.



like that howww.
ahhahs




but it was nice playing with the girls again today. (:


okok. then was eve's 21st bday celebration at JoanBowen's cafe. at Jln Wangai (i think).. near e old Jackson's/ mapherson. its really gd place. pls bring ur friends there for gd food at resonable lower priccee! hahhas. (:
nice deco and all. i think this restaurant/cafe will go far.








this image nice ar. its actually vinegar in a saucer/spoon. ahhahs. taken with flash.


and. my camera jammed.

i posted this on clubsnap for help...

its actually by my Canon IXUS 950IS.
i think its smth wrong with the sensor.
AHAH. looks liked a PS Filter effect huh! artistic. hahahhahas.
switching on and off again doestn' help. but i rmbring giving it light taps and clamping the body tgt hoping all these nonsensical actions would help... and.. it did return to normal.

any idea anyone? HAHAH.

--> (added)


got replies for clubsnap ppl so soon.

damn funnyy.


1) maybe some worms got inside your camera
2) maybe a sensor readout problem
3) Gals with mustaches? Your camera has a good sense of humor.
4) Looks like an effect. Maybe your friends did it
5) looks like an in-cam effect to me, check your menus.
6) models not compatible with camera
7) Think the ink is not dry yet....... BCould be a corrupted chip
8) reset your camera to factory default
9) i believe that effect is called Solarisation
10) or Bas Relief with posterization. just turn off the the effect button or revert to normal setting.
11) Probably a menu option


hahahs. thanks guys! i like no. 7 best. ink not dry. HAHAHHA. film siol.
but i think my warranty cuiii alrdy.



--


wah. and ar, i just found, u saw me at genting also. *slaps head.
tmd. then nv reply sms. HAH. ok. since this yr haven't end, i'm just gg to be eeehwwss abt it.
9w4uacw;4i;c9a34i[IC,3.. hate all this ignorant behaviour.

yea. and i've still stalking her blog.
and she's really still trying to get over this episode.
i really really feel for her pls.
seriously, after all these is happening, u're still not doing anything to make anyone feel better. u have the most irresponsible heartless heart that i've seen in anyone when it comes to issues like this. tsk tsk. i dont think that's an overstatement. i haven't been in contact/communicate with you, but seriously, u are a complete stranger to me now. i have no idea who are u now.

i used to pray abt this everyday. and i really mean everyday. like for ur family, studies and all.. even when i'm supposed to be totally 100%ly focused on mission trips. this has been the 1st topic. even more than how i prioritize my family's health in the prayer list. i even pray for her when u guys were tgt. give me a star for that pls.
now, i dont pray that much. all thanks to my distant presence in potong pasir.

looks like i've really got to pray more for her now.
HAIZ. big sigh.





lastly,

I WANT TO DO A LAST DAY RIDE INTO THE NEW YR. I WANNA RIDE TO ECP. THEN MARINA BAY SEE FIREWORKS. THEN TO SENTOSA AND SEE MAD PPL. I ALREADY HAVE THE ROUTE IN MIND.
if only u were still around me.

BAH.




this totally looks like. yellow and dirty.

sg idol 3

hahs. i think this season's competitive. though i've not been catching up with the whole season, i caught the finals.

so, the guy won despite having so much media prompting to vote for the girl (and still trying to keep everything as fair as possible). 3 seasons in a row, 3 malay guy wins. it goes to show 1) girls vote more actively thank guys. 2) the malay popluation is more gungho and talented.
sezairi, u can tell.. is more musically inclined la huh. ahhas. slyvia has the whole package for a singer la. ahhas. when the results out, AHHAH. Ken lim was like... AHHAH. his face is just priceless. usually they'd stand/clap and all.. dick lee and florence clapped while ken sat back and gave that kenlim-face. AHHA.


Slyvia & Hardy came from TP btw. HAHA. oh what fun. hahahas.


for this season, i'd actually like tabitha to win. she's like got it man. ahhahhas.
but oh wells.
oh yea! b4 the show started.. i was thinking... if slyvia and tabitha were to do the song "When Love Takes Over" tgt, it'd be nice.. one of the songs i like over the radio. ahhahs. and in the end... they did! whooots. nice.



guest performer.. Charice Pempengco is damn gd. i think the best singer i've seen on tv ever. i youtubed her... saw her biography..in 6 parts. damn touching.
when she was singing on stage, i felt so bad for the performers and all.. coz she's like overwhelming the whole performance alrdy. whooots.

tree

it was a great time with great friends, at great place.



genting, round 2. hahas. so. gg in to the casino is a life-changing experience huh. ahhas.

oh yea. welcome back Kristel, who's finally back in Singapore after 20 days! AHHA.





nic's mum made this tree. one of the nicest christmas trees i've ever since. it gives so much.... hope.




b4 that, i dropped by in church for CBC. i came from the back and was shocked that the church was so quiet and no noise in the Sanctuary for outside. i thought they held the event at another place or smth... but it was at the bball court.

honest opinions ar... it felt like a LovePP event. CBC's an event where families get together to celebrate the birth of Christ / gather with other familes... i feel that the $$ spent on logistics could be use elsewhere. i rmbr we used to think so hard if we wanted to rent lights. now, its a whole thing; lights sound tentage stage...
i mean like.. we reallly dont need all these lor. i'd rather u throw in the money to thailand missions or smth. or like bring the budget to the 4th flr building project since there's some form of fundraising there. heck all the stringent budgeting, seriously.

gd thing is, i see lots of unfamiliar faces. meaning.. this outreach event has become sucessful or, i've simply been MIA from church too long. ahahahs!

but yea, nice to see familiar faces that's been through with you in ur growing yrs. then again, it just felt so lackkked again.

followers

i'm trying out this new blogger function...
scroll down at the right side bar and click "follow" or smth.

hahas. i have no idea what's this also. it seems like ur twitter account can link up with this or smth. try it pls! ahahahhas.

merry Christmas

the cbc vid that i done last yr inspired me to do this very randomly.





this yr's Christmas is especially lonely.






The First Noel

just spammed my vids

Hoodland-V 2004- Superman Returns




Hoodland-V 2004 - inspired by Jovin Chiang
part of a skit. this part was totally cheographed by Jovin Chiang. when we're back at Ah Hood Rd..this was when Holland V (the tv show) & DDR was in. ahhahas.




TNY Camp 2006- Rmbring the Green Caterpillar




TNY Camp 2006- Where i was kidnapped, and thrown into the lift.



Painting 2006 Church Camp Banner- the visitor




past 12am




Reviving the Mac Ad Song

the eve

specially dedicated to all the guitarist out there.



planned to cycle and swim today.
but.. it rained.
woke up at 9am, heard the raindrops, then went back to slp till 2pm. ahhas.

then cycled to sara's place.


met up lovely girls. though everyone's everywhere, nothing much has changed. we still laugh at stupid lame jokes and had a great ball of a time.







then. i went home.



and nua-ed.




i rly dnk abt tmr.





from UiTM... during the v v boring opening ceremony.











.

the absence.

my fb status:
Marian Poon wants roadbikeiphonebowlingballnewrunningshoesguitarfitnessanewankleandanewheart for christmas.




well yesterday, i decided to go for the camp's celebration night.
saw ms ang and was happy to see her man. my pri sch PE teacher. ahhas. this world is small. her fiancee's my church new youth pastor. hahs.


well, though i was happy to see everyone and likewise, i still felt that smth was missing. i wasn't expecting anything or what, but for some reason, though i knew it was where i grew up/struggled/my home, it felt that smth was lacking. i know my absence is not one of its attribution... smth just didn't feel like it.


but yea, performances were great. missed the times where we laughed our heads off at winston/kim/jeric's skit.


some of us were playing gutiars. and omg, the chord progression G D EM C, have like 30 over songs. songs like Collide, Take on me, many christian songs, you belong with me and even Poker Face... it was so wierd. though the songs were in different keys, but the idea was there. we probably played that 4 chords for at least 2 hrs, throwing in all kinds of songs. ahhah.s



2am and the hall was already empty.
i rmbr last time, we had angel and mortal game throughout the camp. it was so nice to see many msges and snacks sticked on the board waiting to be secretly collected. especially during the last night, everyone just wanted to keep awake to play stupid card games, sing songs, talk and lepak one corner.
worship sessions were just so powerful.. everyone was praying so much. loving so much. caring so much. it was so God-people centered. no one cared abt the time or like the nitty gritty technical/logistical stuff abt the camp; during and b4 the camp itself.. everyone was abt everyone. i'm not doing any comparison/judging.. just some facts of feelings. yea.
but i'm glad to see everyone enjoying themselves in camp.


so, i left church at 6am. it was too dark. so i played psp, waiting for sunlight. aHHAHA. just then, 3 young boys was on their way to the toliet, i asked them to walk with me to the bus stop. AHAHHA. super embarrassed, totally screwed up my image if i did have one. ahhas.



i really really missed those yrs.
really.




and today, we supposedly had p team dinner at his house. not many ppl went, but the few of us had our own fun watching videos of the games in australia.
after that, i wanted to join the guys for carolling at the wee's house which was near there.. also to just catch up with a few friends. however, there wasn't a direct bus so i had to walk abt 2km down or smth.

just as i was walking... the ppl in the van saw me while i was on the phone with one of them who's in the van. ahhas. next, after abt 10mins or so, i saw the yellow bus.
instinctively, i knew it was them. i even saw who was siting at the back seat of the bus.


yea, i do wanted to be with them. i shouldn't have crossed the road, otherwise, i would have courageously stopped the bus and follow them back to church. in the past, we would hang out after carolling. i've nv missed carolling b4. always pushed aside everything for it.



sometimes, when u're really MIA, its just interesting how ppl think/ give reasons to ur absence despite having urself not saying anything. i have ppl coming up to me to say its because i'm busy / have gone to another church / have other priorties / blahblah blah.

honestly, i just dont feel like going.

there are days where my day is totally empty and free to nua all day long. and just did that or made effort to want to pack my room and nv really got down to do it. yea, maybe its just how u guys show TLC & concern for me.
dont get me wrong, i'm not irritated, angry or anything.... just feel that everything seems so.... so.. so laccckkked.



its Christmas in 2 days! and it just doesn't feel like it.

physio

i went for physio today.
and she rubbed my calves till i was almost out of breath.
looks like another long journey ahead.
IVP's on 19th!
must get well by then.


i went to tampinesOne today.. to uniclo, hoping to find the long sleeve shirt that i dropped after running in genting. ahahs. DUN HAVE.
but.
i bought adidas shoes. my trail running shoes are covered in elephant glue and the base is alrdy coming off. the shoe is damn comfortable now can i can bear to throw them away. its been running with me for at least 4 yrs? i think i'll just use them for gg out since its so comfortable.
the new one i bought's like abt the same.




haiz. raining now.
feels so nua.


i feel like chillin out. but too nua alrdy. right calf is still damn sore.
feel like cycling fast through the heavy rain.
feel like gg to ubin and cycle tmr.

HAIZ. all too nua alrdy.


tny camp is ongoing now.
last time, i rmbr i was damn excited abt it. i couldn't slp the night b4. i rmbr my first camp the best. it was at the boarding sch there. the last night worship was whooots. that's when i rededicated my life again. it was in 2001 i think.
somehow, i rly dnk what i'm doing now. everything seems so.. jagged.

malaysian.

looking back, i was in malaysia for 13 days. i shall be organized and blog this whole trip in 3 easy parts. ahhahas.

to sum up, i think the hours spent in Sunway Mega Lanes is more that my trngs i've had with SIM. hahas. yea.



1) UITM



details of it has been blogged down in genting during the 1hr i had at the lan shop after the tournament. (next post yow. click here!)
overall, i hope it helped to bond the team though i thought that this opportunity could have been used at a more optimum pace.


we learn from our mistakes. be sad abt it. get over it. and bounce back stronger.
that makes one stronger. and i hope, this team can really start doing things together, for each other and not just for an individual in any sense.



i have enjoyed the trip, esp. with the 3 girls trying to adapt to the near-freaky apartment.








we shifted the 2 beds in coz we thought the room lights weren't working at all. hahas. omg. u know, we actually tried to shift in the bed frames... but got stuck at the room door frame... hHHAHAHA.


and the dosages of A&W's curly fries and root beer.



makes me happy and think of daddy.


and finally a gd team dinner at least.




some photos...













aloy is masters champ. hahas.




kristel oh's winnings.



SIM, NTU, NUS, & RP.

SIM bowlers and badminton players.






2) Genting

it was more of a get-away and casino spree. rmbr how pathetic i was, being unable to go in.... the next day, i tried again, and.... I DID. ahhahs.
gd to have have friend who look like you. period. hahahhas.

so this was how hard i tried to look older.




the hotel stay was the biggest in my entire life.


i actually woke up to run.. coz i really felt damn nua, heavy and unfit. so i caught awesome views and fresh cold air...
but the terrain was like upslopes and downslopes. ahhas

went ripley's believe or not..some of the interesting shots...



then aloy & gang came down. even more fun. "21-18. red. 2nd quadrant". it was the first time for the some of us, can call it a learning experience, but we're all so into it in everything we do since then. sometimes even on the lane. ahhas. like lane assignment... aloy got his fav no. 11 and qualified on that lane. ahhahhas.




big group makes everything more fun huh. and b4 we know it, it was time to head back to Sunway for Milo Jnr All Stars. ahhas. oh. on the last day in genting for manda, kok and i.. guess who i saw. ahhhaa. YOU.
hah. i was damn nervous, and yet, excited at the same that. i walk away so fast even b4 i my right mind could be at work. i msged u, you didn't reply. i really wanted to just forget abt everything and just tap u on the back like how i would do to any body else.
but oh wells.


dinner was on travis for his first victorious time. ahhahas.


day in day out.


so, abt 30mins later, we left genting.. on a 120RM taxi back to sunway.
though i was still checking my phone, it was a smooth and peaceful ride back with the friendly taxi driver.




3) Milo Jnr All Stars.



major lots of gd food around. not to mention that A&W is within reach again.
i planned to bowl 2 MQs and the 1 complusory Singles event. but with the $$ i won, i was able to bowl 3 more! ((: big joy. hahahs. as the days go by, looking at the qulifying scores for Graded Girls, u can't help to just take the MQs less seriously. ahhas.

honestly, i roughly know where i stand. because its just 3 games, scores can easily fluctuate higher and faster. lanes are also high scoring coz of the way its oiled. i believe i can qualify.. ONLY if... i've got more money, more time and more consistancy. ahhas. aiya. actually, all these are just excuses. with the Koreans around, no chance. in the end, no Singaporeans qualified. and for the masters, more than half are from Korea, top 9 is 8 koreans (with 1 from malaysia who's 6th).



the best i bowled was a 511. not that awesome, but it was my last squad. coz i was damn sian and totally gave up in a sense... just took it as a relac thing. ahhahas. and i reaslised that if i have this mentality, my shots were more relaxed. the swing was more relaxed, timing was much better, the speed increased and so it the rev. hahas. then when u feel like that, u just feel like trying another squad, get all competitive, screw the timing, pull the shot, slow down the shot and the scores go down. hahahhas. therefore, it all sums up to = train more and train seriously more.


so. its my first Milo. HAHAH. every yr, would procrastinate against it coz of money/sch/church issues.


though i've bowled quite a no. of tournaments and some of the quite similiarly major ones in Singapore itself, this is by far, the one that pushes me to want to step up more. hahahs. serious. looking at young punks with lots of rev and speed, u just feel like wanting to train more and more to reach a point whereby u have a good fighting chance to win a tournament.


seriously.
was supporting aloy for his masters. bowling 200 avg puts u in 38th out of 44th placing for Masters Boys Open. it was only when he bowled 2 278 games back to back that pushed him up to top 4. and when he bowled a 23 tournament, he dropped 2 positions. there were 2 perfect games shot during the tournament one of which a was by a korean, who also bowled a 177. because of that one low game, the perfect game wasn't enough to sustain him. how sick.



speaking of aloy.. he didn't want to bowl the last MQ squad and literally felt that there wasn't any chance. so.. for the 11pm squad, at 1040pm, he was still in the hotel toliet unwanting to bowl. it took 4 guys to drag him out to bowl..
he got his fav no. 11 lane... bowled.. and qualified in the last squad with a 768 series. hhahahhas.




he finished 2nd in the masters... step-laddered and got 3rd for Boys open. ahaahhahas. so much for not wanting to bowl and go to the gym. HAHHAHA. was damn funny. was a gd experience for him luh i guess, with all the cameras all around him, and all the thousands of eye on one shot. hahas. well done well done.






so yea. one thing gd abt Milo is that is so fun because everyone stays in the same hotel, is at the alley everyday, and u just get to have fun day in day out.


oh yea.. ohhhs. 11pm squad. hahahas. "this is a very special announcement...". hahahahs.





some photos...






this is like UITM part 2

Sake Sushi voucher, EZlink card, handphone, genting world membership...










-





now that i'm back and left with abt 2 wks b4 sch starts, i've still got quite alot of things to settle. i can't wait for sch to start coz that would mean i'm gg to graduate soon. ahahhas. that's damn positive right.

i'm not sure abt shifting my priorties. i just feel that i've got so much to do more for bowling. then again, this sport really cost $. to travel. to get equipments to match up conditions. i mean like.. i've tried, i've reach certain personal peaks where i'm on lines that i either make it or break it.

honestly, i am fickled to a certain extent. i really want to go further in touch and start to do more in contact. i've planned. but with 13 days in Msia and over 70 hrs spent in the alley over 13 days, i just feel like doing myself a favour by doing more for this sport since i've alrdy come a long way in this.
then again, i love rugby. it makes u feel more alive. more healthier. hahas. more active. and really more competitive.


so.
i've got a few more days b4 the new yr officially comes.
i've got to think what do i really want to do with my time as a youth.


back to the emo topic on you, i'm finally done with you. for the final, and confimed last time, i'm totally out of you.
no more wasting precious energy thinking of you.
no more hoping of getting back a treasured friendship since i've been trying and u've been blatantly ignorant abt those who care.
no more letting this control my thoughts and the way i enjoy life.
no more letting this control my opportunities of being myself and being nice.
i guess its time that i really get enough of this.
its time i wake up and be marian again. face it with a strong sincere smile. *ka-chiingg.*




lastly, on a final note. i have decided to.......... stop my FB game nonsense. ahhas. i shouldn't start to plant my seeds, rest my waiters, sent visitors or cook up dishes. once i start, i would need to continue it. so.. STOP. ahhas. there's better things to do on the net and not use up my bandwidth. hahhas.



what a long post.