i think CGH hates me.

i've missed 2 appointments already.


haha. my knee is like better. i guess. self recovery. ahahhah. after all that bending during IMF.. hahaha. but today, after a 20min bus journey, had probs walking after sitting for long.

during rugby trng today, my back ached like mad. throughout k. aishya was teaching so much playmakers skills today.. didn't want to rest.

i sorta enjoyed today's trng. it seems that its been long since we've done fitness. sssshhhh. haha.
OKS. ANYWAYS. sat have a last match. haha. against Bucks. i think we can win. i think can. or rather, draw or smth.

till this point. i'm kinda happy that i'm not trng with the 'ntl' grp. coz when i see them train, sometimes i feel the strong pressure.. and its like.. missing the whole essence of rugby? hmmm. but on the other hand, i very much want to be there coz they're learning new things fast.
but on top of that, i'm thankful for aiysha, our coach, for bwing superly encouraging. and not forgetting marli. i tell u ar.. today she gave the team a little keychain with our name on it.
i've been under so many diff coaches.. proabably 10 or more.. and none has given the student smth except for her. i'm reallllllyyy touched and encouraged to keep trying.
thanks marli. and thank u, aiysha.

haha. i sound as if i'm leaving the team. NOT k. haha.

bowling is stilll rocky. i bowled a 161 and a 127 today. i think. 127. bah.
when my ball hits the pins... i dun have that PAH feeling anymore. my timing is wierd. i dun trust my shots. i can't put my thumb all e way it. its like. smths v wrong. my release is superly changing.. not sure if better or worse. .the reaction is like.. blech. i'm playing like 10-10. and its really a straight tight pocket. and it ball doesn't really hook.
abit worrying. coz all over is just wrong. ):
i'm still wroking on it. i hope to 'perfect' it by IP. note the "". yea.


NYAA Residentail proj. the mtngs always fall during my trngs. and i really duno how. maybe i do know how. but i need like support from the team? i'm complaining now coz i feel tired to be accountable. i'm supposed to be like be responsible accountable and all. but at this stage. the hols. fatigue?]

and to top it up. i haven been trng myself. no runs. no long swimgs (besides that day when i lost my everything). and my bike. ic an't cycle yet coz i haven install backlights.. and probably a basket or smth.
and i have abt 2-3 wks ofhols left?

i haven been wokring for jean. hahah. coz i'm lazy. and i really want to R-E-S-T. not that i like to zhuo-bo at home.

smth's stil missing in my life. no. its not IMF.
i think its the studies. i need smth to study? ok. i'm not nerd. but hahaha. ok. shooosh.
i just need to be fair to myself and allow marian to spend time more on socializing. i dun really see myself secluding from friends. but more of erm... i duno how to put it. hahahha.



but if u ask. i'm happy with my life. coz God's with me.
but. (see. there's always this 'BUT'.)
i guess ppl makes it more beautiful, and at the same time, tough.
our personal self plays a humongous role if u don't know.

by why, if u ask, i seem happy and so not my blog. its coz, i have to emphasize, this is my blog. again. a place to rant blah blah blah. a common tagline.
i still share my happy moments and exciting moments that i do want to cherish.
but the emo part always seems long.. coz its smth i have to let it out. more words is needed to try make sense out of it?


BAH. dun worry abt me if u are. not being bhb la. but its the case wad. i'm enjoying myself, somehow. coz challenges seeems to excite me.
i'm still learning and adapting.


btw. our pics for IMF are up for sale! feel feel to browse through the fruits of our labour.
http://203.81.53.28/PA/lobby.aspx





lastly. when i was on the field today, the sky really amazes me. coz i'm on the field at 6 plus. where the sun sets. always, i want to take out my camera to shoot. but again, trng requires discipline. so i can just look up and be distracted. to add on. there was the thin slice of the moon, and and and.. an aeroplane! those that puii out smoke trails in a straight line.


nonetheless. thank u for today. it was a day just with trngs.

question a mark-?

bah.

today, my day was just bowling trng or rather, the roll offs which i under perform slightly.

136 192 131

its like.. ALWAYS.. when i'm on my roll to break that '201-chain' (coz i've been getting 201 3 times already. not even a 202 or smth), i get SPLITS on my 8,9, 10 frame. grr. i'd rather a 200 if thats the case.

but. i'm trying to adapt to my new change, 'dropping the darn ball' if u call it.todays e 1st time i've got 4 in a row, with 4 solid pockets. usually, its like brroklyn, or like tyco kind. quite happy la. then followed by a 9/ twice, and ALL OPEN WITH 8s, AND SPLITS.

uncle lawerence could see my frustration.

my 1st and 3rd game was done on lane 21,22 while the 2nd, on 23, 24.
i tell u. i'm not giving excuses, but lane 21 and 22 is freakin mutilated by the previous bowlers who used POWDER on the lane can. then i really found it uber hard to use my slide properly.

today's the last day for registration for team sg trials. (bowling). every yr, i'm so excitied abt it, missing it due to either exams or church stuff. this yr, i'm able to go try out. but.. i dun have that drive anymore.
not because i've lost my passion in bowling.
but because i dun want to give up rugby. IF i were to get in to team sg, it would mean more trngs, and less time for rugby.
also, this yr, i'll be joining for the wrong reasons which i dun want to disclose here.
i duno whats with me actually. i'll probably like ATTEMPT to SHINE like mad during IP and draw ppl beggin me to bowl for them. haha. AS IF AR. dun even think its possible in my ddreams. HHAHAH.


ok. enough of bowling talk.



after that, i went to town to get my earphones changed as the right side is not functiong properly.

took 36, passed by Suntec
i felt emo all over can.
peering through the window, i tried to locate the esclator, where we'd frequently use. seriously. i really didn't expect IMF to be so emo for me. i guess coz its partially the best bday celebration i had. adn the countless smiles i receive every single day, even coming from the policemen.

suntec looks reeeealllllllly empty.
so i msged serena. she agrees with this emptiness.
IMF. bah. I really did Make Friends.

somehow. i miss meisy. and cheeyong. gary. yuxin. serena. gab. kenneth. melvin. jiannmin. jason. huimin. willy. nic. aloy. vincent. joan. Qamar. uncle john. don. leyying. andass. jenny. constantine. like EVERYONE. even that lady at the registration booth. she should be a forigner. i've taken many pics of her, coz she requested me to.. and she actually buys them. and and and.. i like bump into her on those social events. and i really miss how she smile and laugh with me. oh man.


ok. i should like stop whining abt IMF. over and over.

-


been distracted lately.
mabye its coz of IMF. ok. SHOOSH.
i mean like. that 8 days, we had schdules, we feel impt and we do many stuff with the same objective.
now.
it seems that i'm alittle edited

smth's missing. no. its not always abt IMF ok.
i guess its abt ppl. i miss ppl like sara, geraldyne, and, daniel.
i'm not saying anything or wad but, i feel _______. u go figure. yes. though i have many many friends. not being bhb but coz i do lotsa stuff i get to know ppl. but still, though i know i'm not ____, i feel _____ . (ahaha. the setting looks like p4 cloze passage)

i'm being encouraged by my bro ken. he tells me that i'm sensible, for my age. but at this point of time.. what matters to u in life?
as a Christian, i'm sure of it. but is my faith able to take me furhter?

simple question, complicated ans.

its like those kind where by little children ask- "why is the sky blue?" "where's the dinosaurs?" and, what it means to say "I love u".

sory for being emo.

i just miss some ppl, some attention, badly- in life.

i use to want quiet space. now that i have (coz i still haven tell Jean that i'm freee to work- my telemarketing job) , i dun utilise it. or rather, don't know how to utilise it.


when i took bus 7 home. i got out of the bus to the interchange. and boy. it was really darnnnnnn quiet for 930pm at bedok. all around was literally hazy. and more imprtly, quiet.
that sheer sense of eerieness.
it seems to be left daunting upon me. abt my father's absense.

i know ddad would be uber proud to know that i am an offical photog for imf, and i'm sure he'll be like all excitied with me to get a slr, and work with me on how to take care of such stuff. i can picture him flooding my equipments with silican gel.
i can picture him getting amazed by the flashes and trying to do a replica for his own self invented gadgets.

have i mentioned that my dad is freaking witty? he has really invented stuff to be sold to his collegues to make their work more pleasent and safe? smart right?


this month. my family didnt really celebrate my bday with me. i'm not asking much. perhaps maybe, if i say i want daddy to buy a cake for me. small girl sia.

its one of those rare few moments again, wheere i'm unable to think sensibly, act sensibly, and feel emotionaly 'stable'. hahahaha

to add on. ppl. u know who u are. stop having hopes abt me, pls? i'm not arrowing at anyone. maybe i am. but honestly, i just want to be friends. pls allow me to talk to u as friends. i mean u guys should know better. the higher u climb, the harder u fall. and i've made it darn right clear abt my goals in life, for now. if u think its u, only, no. u're not alone. and that's tiring me out. unnecessary energy (to be harsh) - wasted. pls. allow me to approach to u as friends and no more than that. i dun want frienships to go awkward and all. pls be aware of the consequences. at ur own time. but i've given u much.

sorry to be selfish. but its for the benifit of us. for the comfort of us.



to round up all the nonsense that i've said. i'm just really distracted, thus, unable to perform at optimum. i'm deprived, though i'm being provided for.



lastly. thank u God for giving me so many opportunities and chances in whatever ways. i haven been faithful and i know it must have hurt. but still u're really graceful la. and i wanna thank u for that. i'm really proud to have u as my Saviour coz i'm sure, no one of such can replace You.
i guess i still need healing? though i'm still a happy heart. (: hah. wierd.

My IMF Official Photographer Journey

in the 8 days, i spent $0, apart from the $14 i spent on cab on one day.

-

we started off as strangers.
really strangers for me.

I went alone, in search of the MAS Building. unknown to me, i was just infront of the MAS Building, when i asked a stranger, "Hey sir, where is the MAS Building?"

In that building, i tried to get in, not knowing of the sercuity measures. There, i met Gabriel, assuming we're there for the same reason. we chatted in the lift as we went to the 24th storey, and then i realised that he was from TP too!

I sat beside him, and Serena was there. Joan came in soon, and there, i made 3 new friends, all from TP! Jini was beside me and followed by Jason.
That very day, Jason left an impression on me, as he asked alot of questions. In addition, he wore 'office clothes' for the meeting. So it was like, this is it- for me.


On the next, we had a tour around Suntec.
Was alittle stunned, by the super-changed surroundings.

  
we were still strangers.

then soon, the final meeting, 3 days before the meeting started. it was held at the NYAA HQ, where it took me 2.5hrs to get there from sch. a 1.5 hr bus journey, 45min walking around aimlessly, and finally, a hopeless 15min cum $10 taxi journey.

  

we unwillingly tapped our camera, listened to our advisors. and there, i realised how inadequate i was as a photographer as i listened to willy speak.
f/2.8 70-200 22-125...
and when someone asked what's my camera model, i had to check my hp for the msg that wilson (owneer of the camera) gave. what more- "what kind of lens?"


OKS. so this is it.
Day 1.
we all thought that we're already on schedule. we brought what's needed, or rather, more than needed.

  

we met our Photo Booth, and tested the lightings..
we went to the planary hall, and kenneth and i got intereviewed by the chinese press. the photographer is fun! (:

  

  

and the next day, we had our famous moment.

  

joan, gab, serena, liji, gary and i went to simlim to get stuff and had our dinner.
after that, gary and i went around esplanade, clark quay and all around to get shots.



then DAY 2.
i wasn't on schedule, only a few of them were.. heard abt the MOS shoots. haha. was hilarious, hearing their experiences.
meanwhile, i lost my hp, ipod and was stress abt it, afraid that NYAA might call any moment.



soon. DAY 3.
reached at 7am together with Felix, and waited till 8.35am.

my first assignmet- Mr. Wolf's press conference at 11am.
there were so many press photogs, and all hungry for gd shots. i was afraid. so i stood behind with gary's wide lens, (still not kknowing what's its potential) and took wide shots. when i had enough confidence, i borrowed gary's 70-200 to take portrait shots. jini was there as well.
admist all the hustle and bustle, i told myself- so this is IMF photography for me.

we also got our room that day, with much care from Celine from the JS.

  
#48-210

and made some re-arrangents..

  

ahaha. and food supplies were smuggled in, at the expense of Willy's and Meisy, our OIC and gang. and it was $50 over, mind u. haha.
and, not forgetting nicholas chee's lesson on aparture. i still rmbr that the lighting for the room was at ISO 800, F4.0. haha.


and today, i witness my first PROTEST!"NO VOICE" ahha.


Day 4.
our very first photos were up!! super delighted la. that pride, that joy, all voiced down to that contact sheet being viewed by delegates, and of course, not forgetting the touch screen computers..
it was one of the most hectic days, whereby 6 events ran concurrently.
we're now more or less familiar with the protocols, and more friendships were made.

  


i did a
seminar at ballrm 1, 11am,
seminar ballrm 2, 3pm
and welcome reception, 6.15pm.

the welcome reception was the first time i had to interact with the delegates to take a grp shot. i was at an advantage as compared to weiyu. haha. it was really a fun time. i was really nervous as it was about interaction with ppl of greater and higher authorities. i learnt alot in terms of PR and also in terms of how i carry myself, as a photographer, for NYAA.



Day 5
8.30am- New Frontiers in the Private Sector in Development: suntech theatre.
12.20pm- PROTEST.
2.30pm- Business essay award ceremony
7pm- Chairman's recpetion

all my shots were done with serena! haha.

G6 was born! (originally, G stands for Governors. in this term, it stands for Girls!) haha.

  
tingting, leying, serena, joan and meisy!
this 'policical' group was formed randomly. hahaha. coz, rarely, u see girls in the room. however, it was this special moment that only the 5 of us, all girls, we in the room. so we decided to take a grp shot, b4 being INTRUDED by aloysius. HAHA.

i also witnesss my 2nd PROTEST! whoo-hooo. was fun, squeezing with the photogs, press, reporters, whatever u call them and all.

  

at noon..
the reception nite was just terrible for me.
delegates needed nice happy posed-grp shots. and i blew it.
raymond, yuexin, andass,jason, kenneth and gary(thru the phone! pro sia) all tried to save me. but, the flash was too harsh and the lightings were too inconsistant. so yea. it was like battlefield for me, smiling at the delegates, as well as keeping my composure.

after the reception, the group went to the photobooth while gary and i headed back to the office to photoshop.
on the way up, i broke down la literally. abit shocked at myself, and i guess i shocked gary as well as aloy, who was in the room as well.
they saved some of my shots using photoshop. till 11pm plus, then knocked off with willy and gang. rreally apreciate them.

and also, it was then i realised, photography is really a big part of my life, apart from all my sports and commitments.

took some emo shots b4 i went home. for abt half an hour. (scrooll down for more of those, emo shots).

Day 6

did events from 11am-5pm straight.
11am- presentation by african governors
2pm- small states forum
2pm- FATA Develpt plan.

was quite tiring, and my astigmatism was gettind bad. couldn't walk home straight. haha.

at nite, supposedly to have an event esplande, but in the end,
G5 was born, using esplande as our studio n had a scrumptous dinner at Gluttons Bay.
check out the photos man.
hah.

  

  
serena and meisy. i duno what IMF would be w/o them.

  

  

  

  
the 5 of us, self shot with SLR. pro not?

Day 7
it was then that we realise that our days are numbered.
its sad ok.

  

but on this day, was fun again. chasing after SM for gd shots, being pushed by this press photog, seeing the media in action and all.
and then.
FIREWORKS. my first very unsuccessful attempt using BULB. haha. was too smoky, some shots very overexposed.

  
and example. and this is like my 'best shot' of fireworks. HAHAH. yes. i'm still learning. hahaha.

meisy and gary had great shots. if possible, i'll try posting the video up, taken by melvin for his gf... with his 6280 nokia phone. was great. 7mins plus of fireworks. not very common.

then after that.. went back to the office to pack and all..
then went to city hall basement.. the esplande that side whereby ppl do breakdancing there.
coz NO ONE was there. the bg was perfect. haha. so gary and i took alot of shots. haha.


Day 8
it was the last day of IMF. so there were alot of stupid shots gg around. haha. but i love those. hahah. and in addition, it was my birthday, and i was really pleasently surprise by the grp. (read the posts below...)
ok. let the pics do the talking..

  

  
i like this shot!

  
at the planary grp shots, with aloy, yuexin, kenneth and melvin.


  
haha. can't escape the lenses huh! well. ppl stil owe me more shots! hahaha. jsut wait and see..

  
haha. i'll nv forget this moment.



  
meet my bro kenneth.

  
the press centre!!. where lies my food supplies. 10am and 3pm 'breaks', gd enough to be my meals. oh man.
press centre's COFFEE and TEA. its our booster.
i sure miss IMF.

  



 
this is so banned in IMF.


  
i am wanted. HAHA. DA 'PRESS'

  
due to press harassment, my bodyguard, melvin mah was hired.

  
the formal grp shoot.. not all were present though.

  
meet willy. naturally tall. (:
he's the one managing. guiding, teaching, helping us. (: haha.

IMF has officially ended.
but our journey dun just stop here.
a pic speaks a thousand words.
what more a collection of photos from different angles?

we still have our camp and thank you dinner.

IMF has indeed been a learning experience. i've been exposed to the business world, the protocols and critics. my photography skills have also taken a leap, thanks to my fellow photogs. almost every moment, they talk photography. and from there, i learn. smths, when i do wanna take breaks from photogs.. they still talk abt it, and i still listen. hahaha. so, i keep learning and learning.
i've really learnt alot.

my want for a SLR has become a need, if ever i persue photography in the future.
i'm now looking into photo journalism/ journalism/ media or videography, if ever i'm able to study those.

i'll try to make the best out of my marketing years and i hope it'll be useful..

the time now is 3.59am. ahha. having some probs with posting the many photos. well,
thank u all for walking this journey with me.

thank u mr. james soh, ms aileen, celine, gary, melvin, jason, meisy, raymond, kenneth, willy, cheeyong, nicholas chee, leying, serena, gabriel, andass, joan, jianmin, aloy, yvonne, constantine, jenny!, and the list still goes on on on..
and lastly, mr wilson tan who gave me this opportunity.

  

AFTERMATH..

  

  
A homesick bunch of photogs.