the search

as i began to try and unfold the next chapter of my life, its been tough to just flip the cover over; and its taking almost a year to do so.


from a chillax mac-delivery-rider-siol,
to being a random chiongster credit card terminal technician,
and now, super laid-back and well-paid temp staff at MOE.....



i.am.still.searching.




in the midst of all these, in a way, thank God for all the intensive rugby trngs, sat touch leagues, church preps, photog stuff to just keep me alive.



u know wrt the recent post about the 5hr-brain-cells-killing COMPASS test that i took? amazingly I PASSED it. ahhahs. i failed for the pilot section (well, of course, since the red cursor kept moving to the upper top corner of the screen while i was supposedly to position it in the middle of the cross), and passed for the WO / C3/ UAV convocation. whatever that is.
i think its fighter pilot, Comms (those radar thingys), flying small toy-looking aeroplanes respectively.



honestly, i was secretly hoping that i'd failed it so at least i know that one door is closed, allowing me to continue my pursuit in being an aircraft technician. i mean i'm living the life now. but its too slack. no ambition. no drive. no goals. not nice. how to settle? amen to Steve Job's speech at Stamford Uni. totally gave me new light to believe strongly in ONLY settling down when i'm able to find something i love. the question is now... what do i really love?



so now, this leaves me.. with another option.
not a bad thing la. just.... HUH. NOW WHAT.
i dont mind joining OCS (hhahas.. LOL. considering the amount of comments that i've talked about this unit, 2sides of the coin la), but i do mind alittle of C3. or in another words, Airforce.
all these uniform groups are just in simulation (with the exception of SCDF, that being my initial goal and dream) and i just dont like to train everyday in something that won't necessarily happen. i mean there are other things to do in the force la, but... i want something more realistic. something to help improve life quality of the world.




what do i really love?



i know i honestly can do well in photography. but as a job? nah. zZzZ. its just gg to kill my passion and my eye.
freelancing, yes. full time, big no no.


i know i want to repair aeroplanes. and for some reason, i know i've got a flare in repairing things. and i like engines. and i like to invent things. its an industry that i dont mind pursuing. but the process to reach there is $$$ consuming. and i've got to produce a 100% effort-confirm-gold-medalist-in-the-cohort if i do want to get to NTU eventually.


i love music.
but in Singapore.... errr... where? do what?
i dont mind being a dj (those mix music kind.) i like to edit, cut music. play instruments all day. imagine if i have to do it all day long, I CAN. its something that i will never get bored at. if anyone can think of a job that fits those criteria, PLS VOICE OUT. i can happily settle in that industry. coz i know i can grow in it. so many things to learn.




last and worst resort, work in the businessy industry with all my qualifications.
i mean i can like the job la. but i wont enjoy it if the corporate culture's bad, demand is high and everyone is angsty all day long.




i dont like front line jobs. i like backend jobs.
i dont like to please ppl.
i dont like hierarchies.


i just to love what i do. be good in what i do, provide joy for the work and improve the quality of life.


so right now, i'm not exactly looking at the companies, but at the industry level.
aerospace/engineer vs arts and... hahas. okok.. business.




but i know, God's the dictator of it all.
because of my shit o level results, i got posted to mechatronics. didnt know what it was, didnt know anything, and because business seems more alive, cool and interesting, i used bowling to make that switch. and its all because of uncle sam who made it possible, and also, wilson, who made me enter the photography world.

but yes, that life-changing move was quite rewarding. because i think if its not for business, i wont know what is it all about actually. in the process, i met awesome great ppl, i've done things that i wont do, and go to place that i wont go.




ya. good to blog it all out and organize abit of my thoughts now.
keep my in ur prayers. so long as its God who's gonna make that decision for me, i know i wont go wrong.