quicksand

thank u for reading my blog for those who have stumbled acrossed this nearly 4 yr old thing. if u like read back, u'd realised how much i've changed. be it in person myself, my blogging style, my struggles and my life. haha. i must say its been the 'cliche-ish' roller-coaster 4 yrs. hahaha. b4 u think that i'm blogging as if the end of the yr is approaching, i just want to say that thank u all for being my friends who have travelled with me thus far. be it long lost friends or friends who left and haven been 'picked up' on.... well, thank u.


haha. today. i spent the whole day persuading myself to pack my room. *claps head suddenly!* crap. i jsut rmbred at my Project 365 today. argh. ok. looks like i've got to use one of the junk shots that i took of my room. argh.
anyways. yes.
i'm still in the midst of clearing up my room. its reall packed and bags are everywhere, books are everywhere. i only started packing at 8pm. how horrible.
and now that things are everywhere, i've gotta clear them up, hook or by crook, before i sleep. ahha. i've stumbled across some of my old notes and letters and nonsensical certs from someelse where.. it brings be quite a handful of memoraries as i struggle to tell myself to throw throw and throw. i've been too much of a junk collector.

today, i just found out that i've missed the dateline for the RJC photography competiton now. ): nvm. hmm. i just pray and hope that u'll get over urself and stop being so so... petty.

so today's monday.looks like my rugby trngs are gonna be on tuesday now. i'd prefer it to be on a monday though.

anyways.
i wouldn't say this is the toughest phase of my life so far, but i would say that i'm struggling with myself, more on the emotive parts of it. friendships come and go. opportunites come and missed. despite of all the tracks that i'm on, i'm still unable to erase u off my mind.

haha. seriously. last night, i had like millions of dreams. its those that u dream of everyday life, in every aspects. nothing big nor interestion abt it. its just like that until i woke up. u were in it, sadly. haha. i just hope u're not reading this now, haha. besides, i'm proably 80% sure that u wont bother to even read this chuck of my life. haha. (: but seriously... for months and months,.. it still stays. pls tell me u hate me or smth. at least it'll give it a try.

so. abt 4-5yrs since my heart was there. i just hope to pull it out b4 i drown, like quicksand.
the harder u try, the faster u fall.