what an experience.
23 May 2015. Toa Pahyo stadium. Rainy.
had to miss my Touch league Finals just for this, but i'm glad its worth it considering all the things that i've learnt, not just the friends made but also the unity that i was able to sense across departments and companies within a group.
5 medals for jo and 2 for me.
#5medalsbutnogold AHHAHS. well, i bagged 1 gold and 1 silver. ahhahahas.
i took part in the 100m, 4x100m and 4x400m as first runner for both the events.
gonna be more elaborate on the emotions coz there was so much to take away from this race. so bear with me if u really want to read everything. ahhahas.
arrived at about 10am in the morng and it was still raining. the track was pretty wet you could see the layer of water reflecting the cloudy skies.
it added on to the nerves coz i didn't have spike shoes.
apart from wanting to win this 100m event with flat sport shoes, because looking at the past yr timing, i do stand a chance actually; however i had another issue of hoping that i do not fall at such conditions.
and so, after a elaborate warm up in the cool weather, soon enough, i was at the start up line.
i rmbr during the heats i wasn't focused coz it was the first time running in a race like that, un-trained and unprepared. however for this finals, i actually trained for this. probably not enough to really deserve a win with a podium finish coz it was last min, but enough to give a good race. i looked around the other runners, looked at their 97834m long legs and menacing spike shoes, and looked at ahead at the puddles of water ahead of me.
soon enough... "ON YOUR MARK....". then i was like. ok. this is it. dont think to much. keep control and put those fat thighs into good productive use. and pretty soon....
"BANGGG". and there was the sound of the electronic gun. MTL. (mai tu liao : 'dont wait' in hokkien)
i really pushed hard but just like those moments of climbing Rinjani, i felt that i was slipping back at each step. totally no traction, it was pretty disheartening coz i knew that the first 30m was my game coz i am confident of my good burst and start. whether i finish it top 3 was another thing coz the length of those legs became a factor with distance. hahas. so to see runners who was now infront of me but behind me during the heats during the first 30m was just mentally challenging. on top of that, i had to focus on the control and not to fall flat. but it was just v discouraging that i couldn't really match up.
soon i crossed the finishing line.
visually, i think i came in 2nd or 3rd.... from the bottom. hahahhahs!
but no regrets coz i gave it all out and gave my best that there was nothing better i could have done except to either invest or borrow spike shoes for next year. hahas.
but well done to liyana who was our fastest girl. she came in 2nd, losing out to this really chio and can really run Cabin Crew who also broke the long jump record for this yr. hahas.
look at those legs.
jo did well for his race too. think he came in 2nd for his 100m too.
next was the 4x100m.
this one epic. ok, our goal was to get a silver, just to be realistic knowing the power of the cabin crew team.
i was the first runner.
pretty nerve wrecking coz by aftnn, almost everyone was there. my collegues, ex business partners now turned collegues, vps who knew me and all. there was also that pressure to perform since we're also expected to get a silver with 2 other v strong teams. soon i was at the start line again. the guys were also there by the side preparing for their events which were after ours... so everyone was cheering me on.
"ON YOUR MARK". holy shit.
hahas. i got into position with the baton in my right hand, told myself once not to drop it, and then telling myself to cut the bend as how jo coached me, and finally, run as if you're the best runner in the world. ahhahas. i was the 4th lane runner and i could see 3 ppl ahead of me. my goal was just to over take them.
"SET" whokays. *holds baton tight* could see the baton actually shaking and was hoping hard that the cold sweaty palms won't have any negative effect on the grip.
"BANGGG".
leaving the cheers behind, i ran as if i owned the world w/o spike shoes. hahahahas.
towards the bend, i really managed to over take the 2 girls.. and after it, i managed to get on par with the 3rd one, not allowing anyone to catch me from behind.
passed the baton to xiao ting, almost afraid to let go coz i was scared it would drop, and saw her gazelled off. she's an amazing runner. saw her ran the 1500m effortlessly and coming in 2nd. i think she didn't expect it also. hahahs. funny thing is the first time i met her during my first trng, i thought i found her familiar. by the next trng, found out that her bf was gary.. ahhahhahas. a secondary sch friend i've been sitting on the bus with for at least 3 yrs.
our 3rd runner was si ying, also cutting the bends amazingly. she's also a common friend with phil from touch. whahhahas.
last runner is our star runner liyana. by then it was a close fight and she was in the 4th position. with her long legs and powerful strides, she over took 2 other teams to finish 2nd! saw her doing her feat and we're all so proud of ourselves. team photo is taken by the official photog, should have taken one with our phone. hahas.
so that was the most intense 15sec for the year. hahahas
but that was not all.
we heard that the first runner of the team that came in first dropped baton. hahahs. perhaps my butt too big and distracting that she couldn't handle it. HAHAHS. good choice for me to be the first runner. hahahahas. but yea, not only that, but they passed the baton before the yellow line (baton passing can only be done within a certain zone), so, they DQ. wahhhhhhs. we're of course damn happy coz now, we got the GOLD. i mean, tbh, they deserve the gold coz by doing all those mistakes, they still can come in first. hahas. but ohhh wells, rules apply i guess. hahas.
ahhas. so, well done ladies!
ok, last was the 4x400m.
was actually dreading it. from all those bursting, my thighs were actually aching since i'm off season now. applied deep heat to my right thigh. i was actually surprised, i mean, i dont actually ache like that, not during rugby games even. hahahas.
i dont really know how to mental prep myself coz anything more than 100m is long for me. hahahs. i'm only effective with short bursts, not those long dying moments kind. i really just wanna get over and done with it. however, u look back and u see the specs stand cheering u on, u also cannot like anyhow right. hahahahs. some more this is my first 4x400m for EC.
so i tried to mentally prep myself taking a close visual scrutiny of the 400m round, visualizing how i would shut myself out and pace myself. i did want to think of overtaking the 2 ladies infront of me but that was secondary coz the main priorty was to complete it and not die while at it.
and for the third time, and almost getting used to it... "ON YOUR MARK.."
hahas. getting in position, i take 1 last good look of the distance i had to cover, held the baton tight in my hands again, and being glad that the track was (finalllly) drying up by then though the light drizzle still persisted intermittently. the nerves were still there, but more containable.
"BANGGGG"
I sprinted off, taking note of using my burst but not overdoing it. i'm not the kind who will start slow and speed up at the end coz i find that very mentally & physically pushing. hahas. i'm more to the start well, pace urself and finish stronger kinda mindset. after the bend, surprisingly, i find the gap of the lane 5 , 6 runners closing up. wah. that was really encouraging. so probably it was based on instinct, i ran abit harder just to overtake the 2 ahead of me. but at the 2nd bend about the 250m mark i managed to overtake them. really happy coz i felt good while the crowd was cheering me on. but by the last straight, homgs, the legggsss. hahahs. the fat thighs really felt like sand bags now. aching sand bags that its. so it was all abt the mental game. but just as my physical ache was starting to slow my mental down, away from the sounds of the crowd and just running along side was jo shouting something like "go sportspoon... u can do its all the way poon". wahs. its really in such moments that these words seems to have a big effect.
so i managed to maintain the pace, widen up the strides and FINALLLY passing the baton to joelle who was the 2nd runner. i didn't managed to watch her run coz i was too busy filtering off and catching my breath and relish the face that my legs can be on stable ground again. joelle is one of those ladies i secretly look at while at work. coz she's athletic and has got that cool swag. ahhahahas. so to get to know her eventually and even running in the same team same race was something that made my day.ahahahs.
after being physically sane again, i manged to see her run the last 100m.. and on to liyana for our 3rd runner. ahhas. by then we're in 2nd position. our last runner was xiao ting, and it was a clear 2nd for us. when she crossed the line, we're all really happy that we managed to maintain our form and stick to our game plan.
hahahs. after the race had ppl coming up to tell me well done and my super shagg face at the last straight was priceless. not looking forward to seeing the official photog photos. hopefully his cf card malfunction with my cui face in it. but really, i have never ever ran 400m this hard before. should have asked someone to take my time coz i know this is by best 400m ever. i mean, lets be honest, we'll never run like that during our fitness trng. hahahhahahs. realistic bro.
love the girls.thank you so much for the awesome experience.
soon it was evening.... prize presentation and so on.
special mention to Engineer Jo who comes for trng despite having night shift after and helping the girls train and especially me who have 0 knowledge on track events. i still rmbr seeing him that night and then again the next day early in the morng at work knowing that he hasn't slpt since then. ahhahas. quite glad that for now we're in the same dept so can meet up in the office sometimes when his shift clashes with mine.
photo collaged grabbed from siying's fb. ahhas.
so this the girls with Prince Prem and Meng Chong. the sad thing is that, on my first yr with EC, this is their last! :( Prince is posted to the Philippines while MC is gg back to his hometown. quite sad coz though i just got to know them, i know that they are the guys who really commit alot to this Team SIAEC culture thing. they are the ones who coordinates all the stuff, the trngs and all. also heard of all their past glories for the company. hahas. so its pretty sad that we wont be having their presence for the next few meets.
so that was the end of the much anticipated event. didn't expect the event to be at such a competitive level. i mean, its 'just a company' event and how competitive can it get right. ahhahas. you wont know until u're there man. hahahahs.
but really, at the end of the day, i was really happy. its not about the win or what, but about how the whole thing went about. it was really encouraging to see people bond across departments, how friendships can be fostered through such events, and life with these people doesn't have to be about work or coffeetable meetings. i mean there was still the managerial hierarchy but the line doesn't have to be drawn that clearly when we're not carrying out our professional duties. though it was my first yr, just felt very welcomed and comfortable
i think such events are essential to companies especially at such a scale coz it value-adds to the company internal marketing and productivity level if u're talking about business strategies. many companies do not spend effort and time in such events probably because of the unwillingness to spend due to tight budgets and profit margins.
so yup. that was the saturday.
#wishedyouwerehere. hahahas.
Sunday.. its ah kok and melissa's weddding!!
one of my really good friend and bowling team mate while in uni. he's always on the look out for me and ensuring that i'm ok when i'm down.
really happy that he has found this wife to love forever, and a wife to love and take care of him forever :D
wedding's at Ritz Carlton. seems to be more formal than usual looking at such a scale of about 100 tables. also glad to be able to meet some long lost bowlers!
hahhas. how he proposed to his wife - by screening a 10hr production in a peronally booked cinema at great world city. totally raised the bar and spoil the market. but it was cute for him to think of such a scale. well done bro! hahaas
and what's a bowling event w/o my fav couple. :D
havent met these 2 for almost a decade. hahahhas! now looking all so fine.
these are the bowlers from the brother school - SJI. hahahs. we used to talk abit during the national competitions long long ago at Victor's Bowl that's being crushed by the whole MBS plan. hahahs.
hahas. surprised to see these 2 Touch friends too. common friend common friend common friend. hahas
so yea, i wore a dress.
willy was the photographer covering the event. nice to see him again after all these yrs too. he took this candid shot of me.. posted it coz i thought it was an unconventional print out for such a photo.
hahas. and it actually got 200 over likes on fb. didn't expect that coz i think i look fat. but quite sad coz cool photos of engines / planes or awesome skies never got so well recieved. ahhahas. #materialisticworld hahas.
ahhaas. but yea, probably the most daring dresses i wore in my life.
i guess coz it's black and its the back so it's not too.... boomz. ahhahs. can't find a word.
but i got this at H&M after climbing at kallang wave. it was originally like $69. the cut to $49 and eventually $29. since it was black and comfortable, i bought it just in case i needed something presentable for such events.
during the week, had some events too.
our annual U-Sports Awards Night at Downtown east on Tuesday.
thank you NTUC for all the support these yrs. kinda disappointed that we lost the finals though we're unbeatened in the round robins; but nonetheless, thanks for all the support.
team dinner on Thurs.
thanks for the great season ladies. though its not the results we've expected, but let's rmbr this can regain back what we deserve in the next league. always a pleasure, and thank you charming, fatherly Coach Clifford for giving up time and effort just to manage a bunch of crazy ladies.
on to work, pretty much the same.
just that we're stucked with the 744 these few days. not too bad, just that i will do want to learn more about the component changes with other a/c. but now confident with the PW4000 Starter oil svcging and cowlings. still thankful that i'm here and thankful for the opportunity nonetheless. also glad that feeling more comfortable as a team. not sure if its a good or bad thing. bad thing coz we may not stay in this dept too. :( *fingerscrossed*
we call this The Space Suit.
usually used during greasing so u wont stain ur uniform as such stains do last forever and ever, so stubborn and lethal that even mother poon can't do anything to salvage it. i used this to go in to change that 1 bolt of the Ram Air Assy header. hahahs. no other techs of that shift could do it coz of the space constraint. it was really tight, go in 1x the face buah the grossly dust covered assy 1x. left & right side.
hahas. its gross and can be frightening coz its confined space, that if i were to panic and breathe heavily which would uncontrollably inflate my lungs, i could very well be stuck and not come out. so must really chill. ahhhas. so this is when i (finally) feel very useful. hahas. i mean there's another way to do it if u dont have small ppl like me, which was to remove 2 ductings and electrical connectors which is more tedious and u'd need a more elaborate ops testing after u're done. so being small can help in raising the productivity level at work too ok! hahhas
changed the NLG Door Selector Control unit.
this was one to rmbr coz it was really a challenging environment to be in. it was enclosed with slippery smooth surfaces; not too ideal when u're dealing with hydraulics. i rmbr allan, asmir and i inside, sweating buckets. hahahs. the door was filled with our sweat + hydraulics and our uniform was soaked through. almost slipped down through the opening even though i was taking extra caution coz it was so darn slippery. while allan was telling me to be careful, he also slipped. hahas. thankfully i held on to the top frame if not i would have slipped and became another incident report. its just like putting a soap bar on glass tiles. really 0 friction.
another one to rmbr was this power controller of the vacuum generator.
this one easy to change, but the highlight was gg to the bulk cargo area and opening this compartment that has The 4 legendary waste tanks. ahhahas. thankfully one of the techs brought up this nice smelling spray. if not it would have been unbearable. hahahahs.
and yes, not forgetting beautiful evening sunsets though its getting hotter these few days.
yup. so that was my eventful week.
though trngs have now all toned down, i'm still somehow occupied huh.
oh yea, some sad and shocking updates is that 3 guys from our batch got terminated. 1 guy was coz of some complicated admin issue. the other 2 was because they failed sheet metal.
i thinks its really sad and totally uncalled for. they did the practical 3 times and still weren't able to meet up with the expectation of the tester. rivetting and all these is not an overnight skill which one can acquire. whats more, if we really suck at it, we wont be doing this at our job coz there's always the sheet metals techs who are i/c of these right.
also, i thought they could recourse or smth, but apparently, if u fail for the 3rd time, u're out and liable for paying the bond. i can't rmbr if this part was stated in our contract, but i thought the option of recoursing is available.
perhaps they're really trying to maintain the standard or probably use our batch as lessons for the next few batches... to show that u as a trainee tech, u can really be kannnned if u dont pass ur exams. sigh
from 14 to 13 to now, 10 of us.
on the last day while we're at loyang tgt, i wanted to take a batch photo but everyone ignore me. now i guess this is impossible. ):
anyways, just wanna wish the 3 guys all the best wherever the go. hope they'll able to find the job they like. its never easy to find a job that u like and pays well at the same time as most of the time, its a trade-off. but that's the thing about this aviation industry. there's so many extremes. one of which is the level of paper work and the scrutiny of the skills/ experience of techs when it comes to on the job.
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ok, lastly, onto affairs of the heart.
now that i dont see ur bike anymore at the carpark, and know that i will never get to see u at the apron, its abit disheartening and leaving me at a loss.
i didn't expect myself to feel this way coz i'm in no position to feel this way too.
but for all those words that truths that u've said to me, painful or not, i thank you. definitely gonna miss u a fair bit especially not just for those heart leassons but for all those aviation lessons u've taught me as well.
i still hope that u'll remain in this industry because of the way u worked and thought behind every jobcard u've signed.
nonetheless, i guess its really time tt i move on.
i cant seem to shake off baggages that have left me, though i really want them off to at least be.. happier.
just recently, been msging someone for this past month.
so when saw him once in the plane and he made my heart skipped a beat. hahas.
funny how we got connected through twitter and have been good friends ever since.
before this, we've seen each other here and there coz we're in the same programme just diff batch; we've seen each other on 2 separate individual occasions, one while i was swimming at the sports club and the other while i held the MEC door for him. ahhahahs. if only we're in the same batch. hahas. but actually glad we're not if not cant focus on work uh.
but i just find it.... uncomfortable that we're so comfortable.
it has probably been a struggle for me coz at this point of time, i dont know how to deal with relationships, as in not bgr kind, but just having such good platonic friendships when the feelings start to grow; as in i dont know how to handle my emotions and expectations. whenever we're happy, just like the fire alarm of the A380, those alarms go off and reminds me to pull back my throttle. sometimes i want to msg my emotions to u, but i know v well i should maintain coz i'm in no position to.
all these familiar happy times seem to be taken away just when i'm starting to feel comfortable and i really dont want to lose it. so in the end, my rationale is to not even be worthy and deserving of such happiness for they will be taken away in due time. u can't lost something if u haven't even got it right.
i know this is a shit and probably selfish thought, but as of now, i do want to protect myself first. i dont think i can afford any falls now.
but this month has been pretty comforting and assuring even without any effort.
its all a paradox for me for
when it gets easier, it gets more difficult.
sometimes the girly side of me want to do more for u even if its the expense of my rest / me time, but at the last min, i pull back. just like today, i had plans to just surprise u or smth, but fear just overcomes the thought. and i cannot be taking u to a platform where i cannot manage myself properly.
as of now, i really feel my emotions are starting to be dependent on u. its like if u're sad, i feel sad, and if u're happy, i'm also happy. and sometimes though its just through msging, we're able to sense each other's emotional 'stability'. hahas. honestly, i dont like to be this dependent on anyone. i dont want anyone to be filling up my thoughts and mind like that coz its can be very distracting at times.
i'm probably too broken to provide special care and love for any individual, so i'm very much afraid that my brokeness may break u eventually.
well, the only hopeful thing is that though many a times i do want to give up and retreat totally, i dont because i appreciate the friendship we have now alot.
we met up just last week after my team dinner. though i was really tired from all the hydraulics handling and events of the day, i just wanted to spend time with u.
the day before, i had a htht session with ah huat till like 2am. one of the best ever though we're both so dead tired after work and climb.
and so, meeting u till late was physically very draining, but emotionally very thankful. hahas. though we've got alot of issues to talk and lament about, somehow when we both met, everything seems to be ok.
to me, it was weird and something that i can't fathom.
i still rmbr waking up the next day, still thinking of the time we spent tgt, supposedly feeling tired, but feeling somehow very refreshed coz my issues seems to have momentarily dissipated. and the best part is we didn't even discuss anything pertaining to all our issues / agenda of meeting.
hahas. right now, i really miss u and want to love u as much as i can.
but i have to be clear what friendship means and that i do not go overboard, meaning i shouldnt be doing things out of my line and then pulling back just because i feel like it.
u who have left me entirely, once taught me the harsh way and i should rmbr it clearly if i dont want to lose this special friend of mine.
ok, whatever it is... HEADS UP.
just dont think too much and maintain abit.
let God be that anchor and compass for His plans are higher than ours.
i guess the best is really pray in faith and just let God take control coz he's the best pilot.
thank God for everything,
for this week,
and for this special friend.
