it hasnt been kind.
so in this gap, i've got summons, money stolen from my wallet, cat/bird shit, sprained my finger.... etc. i can't really keep track or rmbr anything now since everything is becoming so... routined.
and so, as how it goes, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger right. i dun think i'm becoming stronger... maybe more numbed to the surprises with whatever Mother Nature throws me. good thing i'm not complaining much anymore, but i need to start giving thanks again and really encompass the total value of what it truly means by 'praising You in the storm'; coz u know, God gives His toughest battles to His strongest soldiers. ayeseh. steady pom pee pee.
amongst all the cycles, this cycle's probably the one that stretched me abit. not so much because of what i do in work itself, but how i'm robbed of my sleeping time. i rmbr tweeting on the morng of 21st nov that i haven't gotten sleeep since 19th nov; 2 night shifts in a row. ahhas. that's probably about 52 hrs of awake-time, with 3 hours of collective sleep. #shiftwork.
so i've spent 20th Nov very much awake.
that's the day of my father's 9th yr anniversary. 9 yrs later the moment where he physically departed the world at around 5.45am, i was living in what he spent 70% of his lifetime. i felt that it was quite a significant moment but whatever. hahas. i'm sure he's proud to know that he eventually has a son like me, just that regretting he had to leave too early and miss the chance of being my personal shifu. hahas.
the last 2 night shifts were mad.
so many tasks on hand with so few manpower.
vs
the previous 2 morng shifts.
so free till i've spent about 90% of my time in the office trying spend my time more productively by looking up the AMMS, google, wiki, wherever/ whatever info on aviation i can get from.
talk about line maintenance man.
there's another engine change which took up most of the manhours. and hardwork. pure, sheer, brutal physical strength i tell you. apart from the avoidable errors and faulty (manpower-saving) equipments, i feel so proud of the technicians who fitted the CNA and IDG back into the engine. ok, in layman's term: 2 bloody heavy metallic components that probably weigh no less than 60kg. and i really mean bloody. hahahs.
while ravin (the bodybuilder- u'll find out that this is a very crucial piece of info) was trying to tighten the bolt, he accidentally slipped and he elbowed shane's nose. hahas. shane's nose bled. and the best part- the torque value shouldn't be that high anyways. and while all the work was happening, ravin's ass got burned by hydraulic fluid because i think it seeped through the overalls into his ass when he was on the ground. and in the dark, even though i'd be trying to practice situational awareness diligently, i've hit my head on the edge of the engine cowling while standing up. it was quite hard that my eyes were watery from the impact. managable, but there's a significant bump on my head now. hahas.
someone's toolbox got rammed over by the tractor.
bolt from the engine got sheered.
miscommunications and tests of one's patience. hahas.
ppl throwing vulgarities at each other during those heated work moments, but soon to be shaking hands over coffee in the pantry.
i mean like, 'the inevitable error of human', 'murphy's law', whatever that can be visually found in our M09 notes just seem to be orchestrating the whole thing. avoidable, not an excuse, but in those conditions, incidents really happen. i believe tt i'm quite well-versed with problem solving skills in ambiguous situations all thanks to TP' Marketing's PBL scheme (hahas, even trained to find our own problem to solve the own problem). and i believe there's always the most ideal solution to a problem.
assessment. judgement. with that bit of luck.
and if some routes are by-passed, u'll be sure to get ur solutions bypassed as well.
whatever la. wait till i'm working in the industry for 10 yrs then say right.
but really, a good job well done to the guys that night.
a view from the small circle window of the cabin door,
making it look like a shot form the pinhole film camera.
"cleaning the cockpit windows in the dark w/o a harness" #YOLO.
hahas. no la, its safe (i guess).
i just find aviation just rewarding.
at the vast airside, sunrise/ sunset makes everything more crisped and golden.
especially after a long night of hardwork, the morng sky seems so comforting.
and with shiny fleets reflecting the warm artifical lighting at night or the morng sunshine, everything gives u that sense of appreciation. that kind of space. that kind of control. that kind of pride. everything all so humbling.
even with the rain, spirits can not be that dampened.
hearing the planes roar up and soar across the skies, u go into self-praise mode, reminding urself that your fingerprints are on the structure of the plane that's battling out the harsh environmental condition. on top of that, i seem to share a closer bond with the physical surroundings as well; starting to feel for everything. ahhas. idk if its a good or bad thing.
well,
i dont think i've very proud of myself though.
these 2 night shifts have also really revealed even more clearly the limitations of being a girl.
the physical limitation. and that illusive self-built or people-placed mental walls around.
i mean like, i play rugby, i go to the gym and all, but there are certain simple things that's just beyond my physical capabilities. i.e, breaking the simple torque of a bolt, or at least provide some form of strength in lifting those heavy components. hahas. not to mention, failing to reach the refuelling panel of an A330 - even standing on the chocks/ jumping to reach for the switches are futile. (while others just have to stand, and reach up. keyword: stand.)
either that or the aviation industry should just have more female so things get neutralized.
idk but, maybe its not just i'm a trainee, but because of the fact i'm a girl, that i dont / cant get to carry out certain tasks. i know that eventually, i'll be working up towards an engineer where i've got my technicians to help me perform some tasks. but ultimately, i feel that i must be able to do them myself right. what if i'm caught in a situation where its just me and my shadow when time pressures are not too friendly. i mean there's always a way out, but y not the more convenient way i should say right.
how now mr. brown cow.
hahas. this should give me a more useful and practical reason / goal for working out harder in the gym right. hahas.
after seeing so many different kinds of working styles of different engineers, i roughly do have my own ideal set of work ethics that i would want to adhere to. i believe that in trying situations, its these set of personal intrinsic principles and values that sets us apart, weighing up to the most significant impact on the outcome of the situation.
and also, my perception of the value of teamwork totally shot up overnight.
the word 'teamwork' has been used too oftenly, too interchangeably with other similar words, with its meaning being so diluted and undermined.
sometimes its really like pure teamwork to the bone that makes a very challenging task much more simplified. this can be in terms of not just physical output, but also of the mental load as well. knowing one another's time and space, covering our weaknesses with other's strengths, simple encouragements..... it all lightens up the atmosphere. most business textbooks would call it- "improving the cohesiveness of the team which would in turn, increase job productivity, satisfaction and eventually ROI"
Return of Investments.
hahas. i haven't really forgotten what i've painstakingly studied in the whole Business framework ya. i believe tt there are good lifelong skills underlying those scheming business tactics though. hahas.
well, the path ahead is still long.
clouded, but yet clear.
looking forward and occasionally looking back in appreciate for what is to come.
thank u all who have been part of this journey with me. be it annoying me, using me, guiding me or just standing around me with no significant amount of impact, thank you. (:
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