Reminded

i just want to thank God today.

it's the Monday. 

monday blues is just an understatement.

been so distracted. and i dont like being distracted.

while in class, just as i wanted to blog through my phone coz i can't stand it anymore... God plopped me something. so

i typed 'sportspoon.blogspot.com' at the link box. and coz i dun use my bb often, i didn't know was actually the 'google search' box.

so a list of links came out.

i came across this blog

and omg.
when i read it, my heart had this fuzzy feeling.
not only i was majorly encouraged, i was reminded how i wanted to lead my life.
definitely not like now.


i rmbr that i wanted to be an inspiration to others through this space. with the many life experiences and epic moments on hand, i can then have things to share here. i was again reminded that this blog was more so to share my exciting moments and inspire many ppl to lead, serve and inspire and at the same time, take all these as a life-long learning lessons; and hopefully readers and also find some sort of refuge for the heart here. u know like those post where u read and go oh-so-i'm-not-the-only-one-feeling-this-way.



(:



so from then, i felt the need to review my thoughts again.
seriously, all these thoughts of him, him and him is just pushing me off the wall to no man's land. i shouldn't just soak myself up in self-pity, make useless comparisons and overlook the many blessings. i'm not trying to be holy or anything here. but really, if we're able to change ourselves internally, our inevitable external factors won't be THAT bad la.


everything's in perspective.


though i've still got not more than $10 in my bank, at least i've still got enough allowances to eat and stuff. there are definitely some ppl even on this country that do not even have enough money to eat and travel.



and so.



today.



hahas. this mong, i caught LTA taking a photo of me on the bus lane. i should be expecting a letter soon. but really, cannot blame me. during peak hour on changi road, cars just think that they're bikes. because its a one way road, i always stay near to the bus lane, aka. lane 3, coz that's probably the safest lane with all those reckless uncles and blind aunties. and yes, i got 'pushed' out to the bus lane coz apparently, when u're on the road at that hour, cars just give u the vibe that motorbikes do not belong on the road. they drive into u lane, leaving u with no choice but to siam and be safe.


i've got my reason all drafted out in my head.
hopefully LTA will be forgiving and open-minded enough.
if not, i really cannot afford this fine.



ya. and to add on. i really hate cars who think that they're bikes; tryinna squeeze in between lanes or like a 1m gap to a filter lane, leaving bikes with no space. then cars behind bikes like us would think that since we take up too an insignificant amt of space, we should just ride on pavements or smth.




ok.



another story.
otw back, just into the right turn of the junction, an old malay uncle beside me stalled his bike and he fell off. music was blasting through my earphones. it took me awhile to realize that something had happened. thank God, there was this malay scdf guy on the bike who was on the opposite of the road that got off his bike to help him. it was only then that i realize what was gg on.

 the malay guy to pick the uncle's phantom up and pushed it across a relatively busy junction. i tried to act traffic police 一个 to stop oncoming traffic while on my bike trying to protect the malay guy and uncle. i helped the uncle up his bike and got his bike started while the malay guy went back to get his bike who was right in the middle of the road.

so after that, the uncle was ok. and we all bid each other good byes with warm smiles on a cool chill night. thank God for the malay scdf guy. if its not for him, idk how i would be able to lift the bike up with a not so strong knee.


hahas. coz it was after dinner with mother poon, she saw the whole incident while she was in the taxi and immediately called me. she thought i met with an accident. hahas.



otw back, i had about 10mins to think things through.
in a way, i thank God for protecting the uncle. but i also thank God for giving me an opportunity to help ppl. i like helping ppl in need. i dun see myself helping because i want to feel good. (yea, a potential debate topic) but when i help ppl, i'm really happy coz ppl can get out of a not so friendly situation. and i really know what it's like to be out of a shit situation especially with the help of complete strangers in Sg.

and through this, it kinda remind me of my outlook in life again.
seriously, 22.
its time that i grow up and do things that i should be doing. my thoughts should be disciplined by my principles with God's direction. its really meaningless to inflict additional unnecessary emotions to the bruised and battered heart. there's really alot more things out there that seeks my attention.


i really should take on a stronger and more optimistic approach to not just my life, but the lives of those around. if i stop being self-centred and ill-disciplined, i believe God can use me more mightily for His good works and for His people.