hmm. and again. i'm puzzled. i dunno wads gotten over me. writting really helps. -for awhile.


today.. sara was sort of punishing herself by not toking as she did not go for her piano lessons.. was super irritated wif her until during tuition when she started to speak..
then, i was surprisingly sensitive today. like a mimosa. geraldyne was wif sara. and she does things w/o telling me. i mean...i dun expect her to tell me everything she does and all. but i duno. she is my best friend. my friend?. hmmms.
see. sensitive mode liao. hmm. eeek. girl .

in addition, i got frustrated juz by calculating the mean of a grp. coz my classmates behind me were talking. usually, i'm like ok and might even tok wif them while doing it. this time, i couldn't focus.


i duno y but when i get irritated or angry or any other blech feelings, i'll neglect the feelings of others. this is my wk point.




for chemistry.. did titration again. the o level one. add sulphuric acid and potassium iodine.. that one.. sian. 4th time. argh.



ppl change in life. i do not want to grow up as an irritant. i wana be shadowed by God image. a child of God. it does not mean that i have to be perfect.. but, i can try to aim high for perfeection.


my class. totally. i got irritated. ppl are still in their.."this is my notes.. go get urs" kinda attitude. wad kind of bonding is this? its like.. when i buy like 3 assesments bks on my weakest subs, they are like.."omg.. marian!. u're so scary".. then i mean like.. hello. dun u all do this kind of stuff?. and when one heard that theresa, nat, ger, sara and i were going for tuition...."omg.. u all are scary!".


hello.s u too, have tuition. i have only 1 tuition which is a maths. others? almost all the subs which can b studied. some even have english. wad is this. and when they found out that i started studying, they said, "wah. marian! u started studying? omg.. i haven leh. i am going to fail...". so i was like.. i falied 7 out of 10 for eoy. how can i stll not study? tell me.
and wanna bet, that person sure is like mugging away at home. when exam comes..the popuplar question.." have u started studying?".. popular ans."no.". yea right. top 10 in class, in triple science class, nv study they day b4. i so believe. so uber true eh. argh.

y can't all of us be gracious ppl? why?


see. i'm sensitive. girl. ----
tml, i am gonna fight. no more excuses and rubbish failures. i wanna win. i must. gonna pput all that i have learnt tml.




i'm loaded. loaded wif homework. nv ending. no kiddin. i planned to catch up wif all my studies during hols. i dun think so. hw is juz too much. mr pang said to take hw and a revison. no. times are different now. there are different components and subjective arguements to this issue. u can't win.



kc tchrs are slack. well, not all. juz that i feel, the tchrs dun make us interested in it. all of their goals and objective is juz to finish the syllabus in a given amount of time. does that make a gd teacher? and when they rush, they literally rush. might as well dun teach. therefore, wif so little understading, how can we possibly get a distiction? might as well go to some neighbourhood sch and excel there. really,.

i regret. regret of choosing the core lit path. initially, i chose core geog, elect lit.. then when learning geog, ms soo said this.."if u all dun understand chpt 1, u all will have a difficult time. u cannpot pass. because all the following chapters are related to chpt1.". and i duno wads gotten over me.. i got scared. and appealed to change from core geog to core lit. and now, the regretion. if there's such a word. if i'm able to go JC, the whole batch of us will be in the new system. we must take humanities. and look, for sure, i wun take core lit. although i can score in lit, but i have not much interest. so if i take geog as my humans in jc, i'm goona slog, and will be like last in class. again.




hmm. mayb i'm juz thinking too much. therefore, i tend to neglect e importance of communication wif God. i lack it.




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