wonder

my whole body is aching.
from sneezing to coughing, it was like little aches here and there. ahhah. i failed an attempt to go swimming this morng. ahah. had probs hitting the alarm clock off. hahaha. i think 90% of the team feels the same way. ahhaha.


today i forgot to bring my phone out... then joel's supposed to call me b4 meeting up. ahhaha. so happily, i was desperate for a pay phone as the mins ticked by. TM doesn't have pay phones!! i was like praying on and on. till...i went to the interchange.. i saw a grp of TP students! had 2 friends there!!! ahha. so i called mum to ask for no. ahha. can u believe that i spent 1min on teachin her how to unlock my phone. ahha. she couldn't find the [*] button. AHHAH. by God's grace, i wasn't irritated or anything, just found it amusing. haha.

anyway. i finally got myself a brand new pair of sports shoes!



it was 30% discount i think.. so i got this for $120. i think its worth it. this is my 3rd default sportshoes. i have 5 pairs so far in my life. 3 is for bao-ka-liao (everything) and e other 2 is for like serious running kind. AHHA. so finally, i can throw away 2nd default sportshoes after 3 yrs. ahhaha. first... 2001-2005, then 2005-2007 and now, 2007- ahhaha. ((: it used to be adidas. but i think ascis its more comfortable and durable. i'm looking at 4yrs now.

the shoe itself is 1/2 a size smaller that wad i usually buy. firstly, there wasn't any 6.5 anymore. so i took 6. also, after ytd's trng, i realised the importance of fitting shoe. big shoes produces friction.


after that. had VC bbq. was looking at my friend's D80. hhaa. it rocks. nikon did not feel foreign at all la. hahah. AND. i realised the existance of a sigma 17-70mm f/2.8-4.5. hoho!!! FINALLY. i've been comtemplating on a 17-55 f/2.8 or a 24-70mm. but its all not within my budget. so heck those 2 lenses.
so yes. i think the sigma will be THE ONE that will replace my kit. firstly, its a 2.8 at 17mm. 2ndly, its a 70mm at f/4.5. 3rdly, its a macro lens! *impt factor. ahha. if only the lens has IS. ahha. rocks la. ((: happy.
BUT. i dun think i'lll get the lens anytime b4 dec. unless i get a windfall.



haiz. somethins i think i'm superwoman, fully aware that i'm not.

run

say hello to 1hr of fitness. ahhaha.
honestly, i was happy abt it. haha. many a times i just want to do fitness on my own... but always failed. now there's the team. and it really motivates.
hahha. my legs felt so wierd after today's trng. haha. now's really the time i can use this opportunity to step up myself. ((:
i think i'll be having a gd night's slp tonight. ahha. and in the morng. ahhahahaha. the pain. ahhaha.

amazingly, i want to thank God for smth. my back! it was pain.. BUT.. it didn't give me much probs. ahha. (: .. towards the last sprint i felt that it wasn't able to support my body.. but it did! hahaha.
i think all the swimming helps to control the breathing.
i'm quite pleased with myself today though. but i think there's still more room for improvement.



during one of the waterbreaks, i was thinking to myself, if there wasn't bowling... i think i'll be having so so much fun in rugby. BUT... i dun think i'll go far in rugby.. looking at where i am now in bowling, this is gg to slow down my performance in rugby. half half la. to me, rugby brings me more drive and makes me feel so forward looking. bowling is just.. like a personal satisfaction kinda thing. if u're gd, yea u get ur rewards. it doesn't bring me that aw-man-trng-rocks feeling like rugby. HAHAH.



alright alright. my hols are depleting soon. i should spent more condusive time with family and friends.

today.. hahah.

trng finally started! was so happy to train with the girls again. (: (:
just hope that i'll focus and encourage myself this time and not loose heart. haha.
coach says 8,9 dec have World/Asian (cant rmbr) sch's championships.... BUT.. i'll be in THAILAND!! having mixed feelings. sad that i'm goona miss this big event, happy that i'm able to go for the trip. so yea.



SSnr Sch Gathering! (:


Class BBQ




my point and shoot is starting to fail me. after all these yrs. ahhaa. i had it changed 3 times, repaired 2 times. since end of sec 3.. sec 4 period. so yea. how.
the nikon pns produces shiok colours.. olympus camera is too complicated... casio makes me happy. ahhaa. heck it. wait till my cam really dies on me then i'll consider. meanwhile, it takes 2.5 sec to focus. HAHHA. rocks.



i miss God. hmm...

zzZZ

promise to post some photos up.

gonna catch some slp. night!

night cycling on fri night. xiong.. ecp to changi village and back.
but.. the food made it all worth it.
haha. we're supposed to cycle back from ecp.. meaning back to potong pasir. but majority of us were dead tired. ahha. so zheng and team went to get the van and send us back to chuch. ahha. 6am. being so nocturnal, i didn't feel sleepy. just that my butt was pain. ahhah. felt like running after cycling... its those light feeling.. but.. dun-be-mad la. haha.



today is the anniversary. good food again. (:
in both occasions, i spent $6 on gd food.
(: (:
gd to see familiar faces. somehow, i wisehd that i can speak fluent chinese.



well. there are 1001 things to do.!!! so many promises and post exam stress. yea.


had worship prac today.... i felt so... mundane. its like.. all my strumming patterns are so the same and so.. erks. and dull. there's no life. perhps i'm tired from the night cycling.


meanwhile, i still must keep up with my trng! i can't wait for the 4th sept! (: (:

shoulder ache

exmas are over. class lunch.










ok. i'm tired. i wanted to bowl at tampines v badly today. coz i want to push my avg. but i couldn't. i was a little emo abt it, then i told myself to get out of emo state. its like... nvm.

i jsut want to bowl well.

i've concluded that i should stop coe trng after this set of payment.firstly, no money. 2ndly, with that money, i can hire a personal coach and learn much faster. instead of improving, i'm getting worse. ):


i must bowl to hit my goals by this yr. i must. w/o fail nor excuses. AND. i cannot comprimise rugby with this.

nah.

still have no drive.

bright sun today.


bowling was... well. tired.


well, tmr's the first/last paper.

colddd

had a pathetic swim with joelle this mrng. total swimming time is 12mins 54sec.
and. double comfirmed that the pool is slightly shorter in length than the normal size. that explains my timing per lap.

sch was like... typhoon. ahha. wanted to video using my phone... but the wind was too strong and i was hold my books. bah. slept in sch for 2 whole hrs. only studied 1chpt today.

tmr is like must choing. but have trng from 5-7.

haha. oh well. i'm still not being driven.


supposed with have dinner with lydia n jas. by the time i reached bedok today, it was like 830pm. by the time i reach there, i think the place would be closed. was too tired to go there too. ):

1 step.

trng today again.
1hr of talk in the room.
and then another half hour or warm up and shadow finishing position.
and abt 25mins of bowling.


to me, i'm trying hard to just take in wadeva i can- to rebuild my basics again. i rmbr uncle francis making us do this drill over and over again. no bowling with the balls for weeks! till we get the drills right. ahhaa
eventually, uncle ronnie introduced the rubberband punishment system. AHHA. any errors made in drills.. 'piakkkkk!' *pulls the red chickenrice rubberband which is on our wrist. HHAHA.
i still rmbr the sight of uncle ronnie chasing sam on the lanes. HAHAH.

i really feel i'm not getting out alot from this program. i just have bowled better during selections la. perhaps i just got to scrap all the negative thoughts and train hard for the upcoming POL-ITE.
this time round, its really no room for mistakes. i make really take this opportunity to make my mark.


haha.
ok. was browsing the web... and...! this is sooooo cool LAR! ahahhaa.
it'll really be of a gd help for all my guit recordings. hahha. currently, its either the handphone or the laptop, with all the noise. ahhaha. erks. and i've got no reliable software to reduce all the feedback. ahhaha.

but i dun think i'lll get it anytime soon. not even this yr unless i make a windfall. ahhaha.





oh yea. we didn't swim today. bad weather. period.

blurr

today i'm seeing blurr things. really sleepy for some reason. haha. i think i became a little high today. haah.

after church.. took the boys soccer. not very nice lighting as the other time. very... 'raw' kinda feeling. today, i found it harder to get nice shots. most of the play was at the further end... abd basically... my back was giving me probs. didn't at the discipline to look through the viewfinder for long periods.

ahah. i realised myself missing ALOT of shots today. its like.. AIYA. haha. my right eye is like blurred out.. its either i go to bed right now, or i'd go check my eyesight.

i came home from a peaceful bus journey. and became grouchy when i had to wake up. haha. sloppped back home with my back aching.
seriously.. smths, the pain gets so frequent to a point whereby i dun even know if its really a pain sensation or just a normal thing. i was so tempted to hunt for painkillers. i rmbred petermoey giving me those.

heck it. ahha
tmr i'm gg swimming. AHHA. despite all the time loss for studying, i'm still swimming tmr. i have to strengthen my back muscles la. i dun think there's other more efficient way. so yea.


gd nite.

Booooo

AHAHHA.

last night, i called estee loi at 3AM coz i was scared la.

HAHA.
coz while online, i heard that 'key bang sound'. super scary. its like the ones my sis heard the other time. she described to my mum and i la. why? coz when dad comes home, he'll always aim at the table and throws the key hoping for it to land on the table la.

ok. so i thought.. nvm. maybe i'm just oversensitive.
then nvm. i heard the door close. it wasn't a slam. just a a ajar door to close. my sis came home and locked the door last night. and no doors were apparently opened. my mum's room's door had those magnet and it is always held tightly in place.

ok. that really started to freak me out. so i told myself.. i think i'm just over paranoid la.

THEN. i heard a mug being placed on the hall's dining table. when my dad watch soccer, he'll always do that. oh man. like FREAK OUT. ahhahaahhaha.
i was really like shivers-to-the-spine man. hahah.


i didn't dare to log off my com nor do anything. i didn't dare to off the lights and go to bed. haha. so i called estee whom i asked her first when she's online. 3AM. ahha. just to accompany me la. i didn't really know wad to say but just admit that i'm freaking scared. AHHAH

so i logged off and turn on the bed lights, off the main lights and went to bed and then switching off my bed lights. i thanked estee first b4 switching off the last source of light. AHHA.

i freaking closed my eyes tight under the thin blanket before the phone lights would go off.

and then.... i think from then onwards. i was imagining things. being too creative is not gd. i was like hearing all kinds of sounds from the hall. so i tried to drown myself in prayers. seriously. i think it was one of the longest list of prayers i've ever prayed.
i prayed for all my family, friends, foes, everyone. even like the government, my furture... AHHAH everything. i kept saying tohavefaith tohavefaith tohavefaith and rebukeinthenameofJesus...peacepeacepeace... over each time i ran out of things to say b4 starting my new train of thoughts.

it went on till it successfuly blocked out all those hallucinating sounds and finally went into slumber.



i had a peaceful night of slp.

hahha. after many nights of dreams. haha. ok. let my clarify. yes, i do wish for my dad to be back. BUT NOT to COME BACK. as in... i wish he didn't had to go. now that he's gone, dun come back lehs. HAHAHA.

i told my mum... and she was like.. yea. come back and haunt u and make u a good girl. ahhaha. i told her. HAH. tonight later dad push u off the bed. HHAHA. she was like.. yea. i hope so ah! HAHHAA.



aiya. nonsense la.





ok. anyway. this morng. i had a gd breakfast with gary. ahha. its been looong since we've met and we're gg to meet like after a longer period of time i guess. ahhah. i still rmbr EVERY MORNG SEEING HIM at the bus stop. SIAN. hahahahhahaha. 6:36am bus.


i also met many friends today.
jm at funan. a pleasant surprise. i miss the whole gang of them.
andrew and sherlene. ahha. also another pleasant suprise.. i saw their family eating dinner. super happy and hear warming la. i was eating dinner with my mum. then mum kept looking at them occasionally and smiling. i was like.. er.. ok.. lets go shop! then will walking out of the restaurant, she was like.. daddy here gd ar and all the nonsense jokes fall in. haha.
and. this bowling guy at johnlittle's counter. his counter was at the bra department la. i was of a distance from him. he shouted, "eh marian!". i was like.. hope no one's looking man. aha. i cant rmbr his name though. we just saw each other at alleys. not really close to him. so yea. and my mum was there la.. lucky i didn't buy anything from that department, but ironically, a white shirt from the men's department. $24.90 SHIRT (finally have a white shirt for performances/presentations). HAHA. the queue was shorter to mum decided to queue there.




ok. i want to thank God for being my peace. i think w/o him, i'd like die in my bed or smth. ahah. didn't even have any courage or reason to scream anyway. ahhahah.
today zheng prayed for God to reveal more of Himself to me. and really, not only from today, but back at the times when the we had the project struggles/camps in sch/submissions... God is being so faithful.

due to my limited vocab, i can't describe my unlimited God in any more words. (wah. quite poetic huh! ahha) yea. amen.

things.

today. i've given a missed to one of the greated opportunites. because of the HK study trip, i decided not to go for some switzerland exchange event from 7-20 Oct. i'll have to pay $800 but ALL expenses covered.
now, i'm paying probably paying abt $1k to go HK for 5 days and i dun think expenditure convered.

talk abt opportunity cost. marginal cost. the experience. everything la.
suppperrrrrr saddddd. ): ): ): ):

big HAIZ.




saw the scores for the league so far. we dropped like 5 position can. PUI la. tough fight. we still got half the league to go man.. pls dun get complacent team.

speaking abt bowling. i ddin't bowl today and it felt.. different. AHAH. sheesh.
and. i dreamt of donald like 2 nights in a row.freakout can.
uncle lawrence was like naming the pol-ite team. then i made it to team 1 and my doubles partner is sam. then donald looked and smiled at me. AH.
seriously. i'm not sure if its a nightmare of wad. but i woked up with mixed feelings.
i cant really rmbr the first dream though. all i rmbr him smiling and just being that encouraging donald to me.

i really miss him being in the team. i miss his nonsense and his little irritating actions that irritaed me when i bowl. and that smile in that dream is too familiar already! those ____ moments at the hospital with him. i'll never forget. i can't really find a word to describe it. its really like those chnl 8 drama series.. someone trying to say all his stuff while holdling the person's hand and all..
arh.


i'm missing too many ppl and too many things today.
aha. can't really study alot coz the theres's-still-time syndrome is there.


i miss my dad.
mum went for church's women's retreat. won't be home tonight. i came home at 730pm today and like... the house was pitch black. i just felt so..... alone. lonely. i ate cup noodles for dinner, being so lazy to cook up a gd meal. i miss the sound of the irritated driller and banging nails into the walls.

i miss rugby trng.
i feel so unfit and so away from my rugby friends and the game itself. i guess even when trng start, things would still be the same.


i miss friends.
i know i'm a person who always put up a front just because i dun want to appear weak. haha. u can call it denial. i miss the times we had nonsense time together.
looking back at how we even started out as strangers, ppl really change.
for gd or for worse, its just up to God to decide. and with that, i do miss being nice. many a times, i do think of my loved ones, but never got find time to do smth nice abt it.



i miss God.
smths i wonder.. issit because i really miss God as a friend, or i miss that good feeling. to me, its a different thing la. i just got to work harder and put words into action.



i think its quite wierd saying all these here. so publicity and amplifying all those feelings behind those walls, even after ironically saying that i'm putting up walls. ahhaa.

i think now, any slightest hurting thing wil ljust make me cry like a kid la. AHHA. heck it. AHHA. i know i can be strong if i want to la. HAHA. i always tell ppl what doesn't kill you makes u stronger. hope this will just take me far.

its just v frustrating to want something which u kknow u can never have even if u're the wealthiest and most powerful human on the planet.

this guy handsome WHORS. ahhahaha.



coolios right. act cool with RETRO sunglasses. haha.
i have his picture! :p



well.
to all those exams takers.. psle to A levels, just study hard la. dun slow down. chiong ar.



hahha. browsing through happy photos. ahahha. thats why i love photography. the moments can be kept in view literally. ahhaa.

881 again!

watched with mum and sis again. this time is was quite different. last time i watched with joela n randall, e theatre was filled with only 5 rows. then today, whole theathre packed with aunties and uncles. to me, it was a heart warming thing to see my mum's generation and above to be in GV. the experience was really diff. and the audience laughed at every single joke la. ahhaha. after we made our exit, i saw 2 aunties' eyes red and sniffing. ahha. i was like. cool sia. 881's a gd show. should watch it! cheers to Royston Tan. (: but i felt that the effects were rather too extreme. ahha.








so today, went to sch to 'study'. haha. didnt really study much coz i had trng.
see this ball!



its a houseball. i was quite amazed by it. it was like 5 pounds, had 5 holes. i could literally throw it up in the air and stuff. today's trng, we had claralim to led us in warm up. seriously. 3 times. we did the 15 exercise because coach wanted us to do again so as to rmbr the whole sequence. (btw, yay, heard that clara's coming to tp! (: (: (: happy sia. (: (: )
personally, i really felt that i was in childcare la. i just felt so so... like treated as a pri sch kid. it was alittle uncomfortable for me la. haha. no la, i'm not a deliquent. probably i think i'm older and all the ego that goes along. haha.
but seriously.
1hr talks abt being discipline. talks abt behaving well. talks abt doing this and that. its really really becoming very very childcare-ish. really. i'm not exaggerating. proabbly its the way things are being brought across as i-am-the-tchr and u-are-e-student, so listen.

so today. trng hasn't really like gone into proper yet. we were still bowling games. to me, i jjust needed that time to train for POL-ITE and probably Sg Open. i guess that's y i'm so frustrated. coz we paid 2hrs to train. and we're not putting full 100% of the time into proper bowling-related stuff. and as of yet, i didn't really learn much.

haha. but i'm happpy today! look down ->



i dun bowl like this very often. i'm just happy that my first ball avg is 8.9. i think unc Lawrence would be happy if he sees this. but for the last game, i was loosing it. my timing, my release were all gg back to my old habit. i need to improve.

ok. so we have 4 blocks of 9 wks to go. i dun think i can sustain through e 3rd block. UNLESS i make significant improvements. coz i really could just use the money and go have personl coach and learn faster.
to think of it, the game is in 3 mnths time. 3mths to make every right and consistent requires alot of focus to me la. every trng, i learn smth new. but when the next trng comes, i only apply probably 40% of last wk's trng. i'm talking abt sch trng for now. coz i'm just taking c o e as an extra thing. i realy duno what to do nor improve my situation AND make everyone happy at the same time. i dun want to hurt anyone.
seriously.


my hopes are like fading off la. gotta find an alternative route. this is not working.



another photo from national day07.



Sheltered
The signature blazing sun still shines despite the dark clouds in the late afternoon. A grandmother shelthers her beloved granddaughter since afternoon while waiting for the fireworks at night.




Peter Yorn- Undercover
(Spiderman 1 Soundtrack)

Say the talk, and I won't mind
The days are caused, you know I never try
And I love you like the one I used to know
And if you never had the time
To last an ordinary problem
And I said I'd like to have a place to go

And you live, and you try
I could never find another
If you walk me to the car park, I won't go

To I live this all time
Flashing for that sees be saw you
I could love you like a sister,
But never had
Drawing circles in your concrete
I will know your every move
And I'll send ya, i'll send ya

And you live, and you try
I could never find another
If you walk me to the car park, I won't go
And we live, and we try
Live was hard on us between us
I will love you, I won't let go

We are one inside these walls, undercover
We are one inside these walls, undercover
We are one inside these walls, undercover

We are one in
We are one in
We are one

And you live, and you try
I could never find another
If you walk me to the car park, I won't go
And we live, and we try
Live was hard on us between us
I will love you, I won't let go

We are one
We are one
We are one
We are one



totally.

army market

i finally bought my big bag for the trip. haha. along with a rain cover. haha. went to army market. the black sling bag u see is sy's one. ahhaha. and i'm sad that he's decided not to buy my bag after all. haha. coz i've also decided not to buy his coz its really to small to put my lens.

i think we had a gd time. ahha. the tech savvy ppl would think so. AHAHAH.

walking around with this bag is quite suspicious looking. haha. a few ppl asked me... "u came from camp?" ahha. i was like.. erm.... no. haha. i just got this bag for camp. hahah.




wanted to run this morng. was to lazzy to get out of bed. joelle and estee has been sick. ): tmr, i will ATTEMPT to swim. but i think most probably wont again. have trng. after today's point wrk, my toes are like blister-fied.

tmr i'm like watching 881 again with my mum and sis. ahha. its been like probably 7yrs since i've watch a moive in a theatre with my family. haha.

begger.

HAH. i got a 232 today! but the first few frames is not bowled by me.... but. i got a 5 5 begger..!! ahha. x 9/ x x x xx9 and a few more spares behind. ahha. i'm super proud of it la.
trng... today was. erm. 45mins of taalking... talking abt discilpine in the confernece room, and many many interruption to do the video, again for the 3rd time.
i really cant afford to bowl at such an expense.

e hemstring area is like painful. but its those bearable pain kind. but my butt is pain la. i think the muscle kenna pulled again. ): ):
somehow, i feel super auntie leh. my back is pain, so its like literally my whole body la. grr. and i didn't do anything much.
maybe that's y. :\



today was like.. slack.
whole day play hp game... and... Neopets. AHHA. thanks to Sixiu for helping me get the faeriequest item. AHHAHA.

haha. phew. (:

i duno wad to say already. must study hard for mbs. ahhaha. aim for full marks. ahah.




been thinking abt the trip in nov/dec.
this yr, i feel afraid. not so much because of the koreans' mishap...
but its like.. i feel alittle insecure. its a wierd feeling though.
proabably its because i've been watching 'air crash investigation' , 'nat geo investigates' , 'secs b4 disater'..... and now, i'm alittle worried/afraid to fly.
and there's the upcoming hk trip. keep praying man.

cameraphone images

was tasked to watch over these 2. super fun time lar. jon was like playing with the tripod.
really cam whoring sia.



this is like from my mum. haha. she went shopping with sis today. she chose it! from 77th street. she quite HIP ar. haha




and. from uncle james. he's clearing his stock. wasted sia! if only he's a caono user. haha. so now, i've got a set of cool funky mouldy and fungus filled film system. hahha.


but i think i'll use this bag for mission and travel. very nice to use. VINTAGE sia.

rise and fall

today was the final roll off.
coach named the 16 boys and 12 girls

i'm thankful to be one of the 12 despite perfoming so badly during e 3 day roll offs.
the girls' side are somewhat more predictable than the guys' side.

for the boys, with personal reasons.. i was quite disappointed that some could and could not make it to the top 16 boys. its both mixed feelings la. i feel for them. its like... so close, yet so far.

i really could have done better.

and u know wad. i pulled my leg muscle while bowling the 2nd frame, 3rd game today. coach says its a hemstring.. but it felt more like a muscle. i was like unglamly applying deep heat onto my leg at the bowlers' area la.
but this is not an excuse to bowl badly. infact, this minor 'injury' allowed me to be more cautious abt my slide... coz i always rush the slide and loosing all the balance.


heck la.

now i have to train harder and bowl better.
when rugby trng resumes.. i guess it'll be tougher.. but yea, i still have to try. haha. literally.


anyway. after WAITING FOR FOO SY for 1 HR, we finally grabbed dinner and went to shoot fireworks. splendid fireworks but was too smoky again. ): super lazy to photoshop much. so here's the pics.
my com is like loaded with files everywhere la. i must tidy them up some day.
argh.

dash

how would u live your dash?
; at ur tombstomb: 1989 - 2007

listening to Shawn McDonald- Simply Nothing and Take this Life

haha. abit emo songs huh.

i was loooking at the collage i've made sometime ago and have put it as my dp, be it friendster or msn. haha.
i realised that my life is constantly filled with things to do and things to be accomplished. constantly filled with occupying time for so many things, people at the expense of myself, and more imptly, God. but with that, God has been the center of all things in my life.
however, in situations, ppl tend to rule my life- not so much... but sometimes i just simply do too much to please Man.

proabably just not up to expectations at times.
but more imptly, we have to learn to let go.

well. i dun know why this post is even up. haha. its not that i'm facing any prob or wad.

that's y in my previous post, its abt losing friends. ahha. i mean seriously. why persue smth which hurts u even more.
same applies to that individual. haha.
why waste time.

i'm not sure if giving up on friends = sinning. but i know that it doesn't go well with being a salt and light for all. but, i've tried. (:

but sure, i do miss the times when Donald's around.. the times at simpang, voidecks, emo nights and cabbing. haha. the thing is that i dun mind losing them all coz ppl have changed. we can't trust ppl any-oh-how now. ppl wants the best for themselves, at the expense of others friendship. its a materialistic world.

thus, another reason why i want to bowl well and prove myself.
i really want to thank God for the new friends. haha.
"you lose some, you gain some."
these new friends- the difference is that they're more sincere. i'd probably be sounding naive, but i do follow my heart many a times.
the new yr1s i know, really thank u. like sam liew who's back bowling with me again. haha. my technically new twin, and the most encouraging team2.
it's make my painstaking journey worthwhile.


i can't simply thank God enough for all that He's blessed me with.

team wrk

today, we won ntu... pts system... 14.5 to 5.5. (: (:
on the scoreboard, this is quite an impt match coz they are 1 level above.. affter today, we'll climb 2 pos up! (:
personally, i didn't hit my goal. but i managed to win 4 pts... if we calculated correctly. (:

today. i'm alittle disappointed by a team who doesn't care abt their fellow team. we're all out to win. so wad makes u think u're on a higher ground? just because one of ur bowlers may not come, u want to take one of our bowlers. so if lets say we allow u to, will u allow her to bowl for many wks once she's in ur team? v disgusted by their attitude la.
heck it. not to be spoil sport, but we played against NTU, we got 14.5 and they played agains AJ, they got 14 too.

all i know is that team 2 is doing well. not because we're technically strong, but we're as a team.



anyway. after today. i reaslise that its gd to loose friends too. its not all bad. coz when u loose them, u loose them along with all those expectations. and wad more, friends who doesn't appreciate you, u take advantage of u, make use of u, HUMILATE you, look down on u.. they are not worth being friends at all.
i'm tried of just laughing it off and saying its ok, coz after all, they mean it. and its not abt jokes anymore.

so yea. i'm glad tt i actually spent $15.60 on cab alone back home today.
rather than lowering my selfesteem. ahhaha.

i just thank God for team2. i just hope we'll stay and one, again next yr, and not be swayed by just the gold.
even we we do loose out on a medal this yr, we have fought hard to come back. its time we show ourselves as a team and make donald proud in a way.



and if any of u team *ahem* should be reading this, i guess i dun owe anyone an explaination. coz i know that i'm not doing anything that is unethcial. (:
gd luck yea,
may u seriously bring back the Gold for the sch once again. (:

Girls' Night Out

ahha. i played with the rugby girls and we got champs and 3rd. HHA. super cool. i really had fun with them... and seeing the yr1s (: ... makes me (: too! i really miss trng with them.


haha. here are some left over photos. ahha. took this reflection at a bus stop. my hair loooks super brown la.




click here for more COL photos.


b4 the capt's ball game, i had COE trng. that's why i missed 2 matches.
uncle sam soort of scolded those who didn't bring the evaluation forms. i was alittle uncomfortable with that. not because i feel that i should not e scolded or wad... but i rmbr him saying.. by NEXT WK and if possible, by next trng.
so yes. he was gg on abt being disciplined abt it and all. i got alittle disheartened.


and then.. he was explaining to my lane ppl abt playing 10-7. as all bowlers know.. 10-7 means that's the launch angle, ball lands at 10b and follow through e arrows at 7. BUT. his was "ball passes through 10, breaking at 7 board at brown strip area". after that, i went to attempt to clear my doubts. and he said its the modern bowling. not that i dun trust him, but i needed clarification. so marc wee and unc lawrence was there... marc wee said that his coach didn't tell him that.. and as for uncle lawrence... he'll go check it out... but just follow wad unc sam says for now.


i duno but i'm really doubting my decision in this whole programme. ahha. purchase dissonance- from marketing. wad's more, i'm paying for it. i really should have bowled well during the selections and make it to double A. i heard that there are a few girls over there. better go check it out. ):
heck it la. i think i'll just go and attempt the nat trials and go through all the long process.hope it doesn't clash with anything.


ok. heck it! hahah.
after the event, went out with sc ppl to eat! (: had gd time la.








hhaha. (:


just want to thank God for everything.

881

movied with joel and randall after dance. ahha.
nice storyline. not nice effects. but very nice props.

Celebration of Learning.it seemed like a 2mo2 thing la. joelle, estee and tiffany are excellent presenters. ahha. ben and roy are immproving alot. i was like. shaking. coz i'm after joelle.... and she really took the stage la. haha.

then 2M02 had the whole LT to themselves.




this is a SUPER FUNNY PHOTO. guess who! HAHAHAH.

haha!

Your Birthdate: September 20

You may watch someone from afar before you finally decide to make your move. It takes a long time for you to develop an attraction to someone. Generally, you prefer to pick who you love. Anyone who tries to rush you is in for some heartache. Number of True Loves You'll Have: 4 Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 4 You are most compatible with people born on the 2nd, 11th, 20th, and 29th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

In 1989 (the year you were born)

George H.W. Bush becomes president of the US The largest oil spill in US history occurs after the Exxon Valdez strikes Blight Reef in Alaska's Prince William sound In Liverpool, England a soccer stadium barrier collapses killing 94 people Hurricane Hugo causes 71 deaths and $4.2 billion in damage A massave earthquake hits the San Francisco Bay area minutes before the World Series between the Giants and A's The Berlin Wall comes down, symbolically ending the Cold War Serial killer Ted Bundy is executed in Florida's electric chair Ayatollah Khomeini places a three-million-US dollar bounty for the death of author Salman Rushdie Actress Zsa Zsa Gabor is arrested in Beverly Hills, California after slapping a motorcycle police officer Nintendo released its popular handheld video game player, Game Boy Oakland Athletics win the World Series San Francisco 49ers win Superbowl XXIII Calgary Flames win the Stanley Cup Batman is the top grossing film "Look Away" by Chicago spends the most time at the top of the US charts Talk show host, Geraldo Rivera's nose is broken during a taping of his show, when a fight erupts on the set between guests The Arsenio Hall Show and The Simpsons premiere Dragonball Z premieres on Japanese television

What Happened the Year You Were Born?

Your Personality is Very Rare (INTP)

Your personality type is goofy, imaginative, relaxed, and brilliant. Only about 4% of all people have your personality, including 2% of all women and 6% of all men You are Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

You Are 8% Girly

Um... you're a guy, right? If not, you're the most boyish girl in the world. And for you, that's probably the ultimate compliment.

How Girly Are You?

You Inner Gender is Female

You're sensitive, caring, and willing to connect with anyone who's open to you. You make friends easily, and you enjoy all sorts of conversations. You understand most people you meet - better than they understand themselves. You're totally a woman... or at the very least, your soul is female.

What's Your Inner Gender?

You Make a Great First Impression

You can handle almost any social situation with grace, even the tricky ones. Strangers often find you charming and interesting. You are often remembered fondly. Even if you're not naturally outgoing, you can make conversation with anyone if you need to. Whether you were born this way or had to work to get here, you are definitely charismatic. You're popular and well liked. People definitely look forward to being around you. Your social connections bring you a full and rich life. You understand how important it is to make a lasting impression.

What Kind of First Impression Do You Make?

You're Very Fit

Congratulations, you're totally fit and doing everything right. Keep it up. You're doing great things for your health and probably inspiring others. Be sure to keep challenging yourself so you don't get in a fitness rut!

Are You a Fit Girl?

You Are a Moderate Mama

You're not overly political, and your views fall more with the American mainstream. In fact, it may be difficult for you to decide who to vote for at times! Your approach to politics is reasoned and well though out.

Are You a Liberal Lady or a Conservative Chick?

You Don't Have a Boyfriend Because You are Too Shy

When a guy gets to know you, he finds a great catch Problem is... you're too shy for most guys to get to know. From meeting someone to dating, you usually have your guard up. And while you're just holding back, it makes you seem like you've got something to hide.

Why Don't You Have a Boyfriend?

Your Love is Based on Friendship

For you, chemistry doesn't really happen without compatibility. Companionship and openness are the most important parts of your relationships. Whoever you love should be your best friend. And falling in love with a good friend is never out of the question. Why your love can last: You only fall for people who you truly understand... and who truly understand you Why your love can fail: Sometimes you don't admit how important physical chemistry is to you

What Is Your Love Based On?

Break Up? Are You Kidding?

You're relationship is top notch, period! Why are you even taking this quiz? :-) Maybe you know you've got a good thing going Or maybe you're a little shaky from a fight Either way, stick with this guy!

Should You Break Up With Him?

You are Not Ready to Date Again

And deep down you probably know it. Your ex is the number one thing on your brain. And you're still suffering from the post break-up blues. This is when you need to take care of yourself - And take a break from men (especially your ex) It's time for you to pamper yourself! Warm bath, plenty of essential oils, and a good book.

Are You Ready for a New Boyfriend?

angsted sias!

sch abit slack today.

after that was out with estee and joelle to get presentation stuff. G2000 sale ceased ytd! sad. haha. so in the end didn't get anything. typical aunty. haha.
they got their heels! (:

oh yea.
century square toilet....






yes. to confrim again, it is life in the female toilet. i can like jollywell study there la. look at the couch!!!!


haha.

then was the first trng.
uncle sam is my coach. he is FROM MY CHURCH. hoho. so exciting! haha.

had a 1hr talk in the conference rm b4 heading down to the lanes.
i'm angsted la. the 3 acsi boys are really.... argh.
lets put the technical part of bowling aside.
so there's 3 of them on 2 lanes, including me.. is 4.
they are super.... argh. let me just quote them, i dun want to judge.. u guys decipher for yourself. this is wad they said...
"(looks at bowlers on other lanes) wha. i wonder how they get in"
"wah. at this rate i'm bowling. sure perfect game la. sian."
coz we're on practice mode so no scores on the console.

to add on to my angsted-ness,
it was pretty wierd that they had to stop all bowlers from all 6 lanes to just video ONE bowler.. let me try help u visualise... 'just to get a gd angle..', the bowler who will be videoed will be on lane 2 and the video camera will be all the way at lane 6. so that one bowler just have to bowl one shot and that's it.
i'm quite sure with one shot, u can't realy tell our routine. and everyone will be watching from everywhere.
rreally wasted trng time and $. its like the lanes are still on la. but thank God, it was real soon that we resumed bowling.


haha. and all of them are like psle, olevels. i'm like the da jie there.
its just plain wierd.
but i thank God for 2 new friends- claudia and joshua.
joshua plays rugby too! and he's from sas and he knows my whole bunch of sa ruggers. haha.

oh man. i really missed my twin la. i should have bowled better during the selections.
seriously. if i do not progress during this whole 36wk prog, i'll consider gg for the national trials instead of this prog la. whether will i get in or not, it's God's call. i'm quite neutral abt it. i rmbr i REALLY wanted to be in the national squad in sec sch so that i can progress faster. but now, with touch rugby, things are slightly different la.
i miss rugby trng. it'll only start in sept.


after that, its supper time with sc ppl. had great fellowship. it jsut felt so gd to lepark at simpang bedok. this is wad joel ate. AHAH. randall had AWESOME mee smth. haha.



taken with my pns. my pns is dying. the focusing is like... sai la. ahha.


oh yes. fact of the day: randall is sam ong's BLOOD BROTHER. i still need to process this information. haha. i've known them for a gd 1-2yrs.


tmr is COL. hoho.

homed!

after church had mission trng then went home.


felt so gd to be home b4 sunset.

next wk is yet another hectic wk.
looking forward to tmr's first COE trng!! (: (:
the coach emailed us to say that he can't wait to see us. HAHA.

faith is believing the unseen.

e = mc^2

just felt like saying that.



today's evalutaion is like... 12 13 14. KILL ME PLS.
i really hate it when i just cant perform. its not that i cant. but my sparing is like sucks today. the only comforting thing is that coz now my speed and rev changed (confirmed by vincent and edwin!) so PERHAPS i jsut can't adjust to my sparing, yet. it doesn't make sense because spare ball goes straight. but heck. i still can do way better. i'm not at my best at all.

i jsut hope that for yishun, i can bowl well and defeat myself.
i want to bowl with my twin!!! ): ):


church.BBQ. i think its a very gd platform to bring back ppl. to just chill and talk.
meet jasper. he is darn photogenic. ahha. he makes my pic looks nice.







if only i had the courage,
if only i had the words.
if only i had the content,
if only you had the hertz.



i guess after all this while,
both of our lives have changed.
i'm not sure abt you,
but i know i've become stronger.

HAH.

will totally rmbr this...

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
and still I have the pain I have to carry
a past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
only in hopes of dreaming
that everything would be like is was before
but nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
they disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

after all this time
would you ever wanna leave it
maybe you could not believe it
that my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you will ever know
a part of me died when I let you go
and I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me dies when I let you go



hahha. say hello to emokid. ahha.

the difference

hoho. note the shirts. ahahah. we are rockin' marketing students. HAHA.


todays. FAOM. heck it. i got brain jammed. super sian. i totally forgot wad is income statement coz i was too frequently using p&l. heck it.


we... as for today, i think our class is gg through quite alot.
i dun see any purpose blogging the whole 2 scenerios here today. but i just want to say this- being defensive is not going to help. just take a while and reflect. i know i've tried, its really up to the reciever whether you want to do smth abt it. we're not expecting you to change your life. but we're hoping that u'll learn and change for the better. the word perception is just too overly used and really just cancels the whole part of understanding. we actually went to the mtng to help, and not just to hear ur defences.


as for scene 2, a big sincere thank you. its a step of courage and hope. but keep heart. coz there will be obstacles, just be prepared for it.


i just want to thank God for everything. for providing me with splendid classmates. we're a different bunch. but, we're able to be as one. i want to thank God for being so so so timely. time is in His hands. thank You for Your plans. to put it simply, we complement each other.



lastly, we had bolloywood night at agnes' place today. was a extended cell thing. was fun. we had lipsticks to draw the dots on our foreheads and elaine provided us with cool bangles. we had good homecooked indian food, indian trailer, and a 3.5hr long bolloywood movie!! haha.
just want to thank God for the time that i'm able to rest for awhile.


now, its ppt slides, PS test and law project. work hard man.